SATIRE: Housing and Residence Life to prioritize ‘screwing you over’ in series of new policy reforms
You work hard, play hard, and at the end (or middle) of a long day you want to nap hard too. But don’t get too comfortable, because the Office of Housing and Residence Life just released its action items for the 2024-25 school year. Among other initiatives, HRL seeks to seriously prioritize “screwing you over” in the year to come. They elaborate, “yeah I’m talking to you, punk.” So put down that $7 coffee from the Bridge and read up on how HRL is “gonna take you to pain-town, buster”: