[Editor's note: Eagle Rants are no longer edited for AP Style and grammar. That said, here are the Eagle Rants Rules. Rants in violation of the rules below will be automatically deleted. •NO profanity •NO spam, promotions, pyramid schemes or other unsolicited material •NO invasion of privacy and no harassment •NO hateful, defamatory, obscene or threatening Rants •NO advocating illegal activity •NO Rants over 100 words
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•Dear Trust Fund Baby: You mis-interpreted my Rant. What I meant was that my parents couldn't always AFFORD basic items without my help. And you probably never had to face that. Just saying. Other WI-people: Yes. We need to meet up for REAL food! I don't know how people here have lived so long without tasting brats or custard...
•@"if there’s anything better than a warm TDR sugar cookie, I haven’t discovered it yet." TDR SCONES ON SUNDAY MORNING. 'nuff said.
•@People pranking Mayflower: Please grow up and start living your life instead of harassing other people's.
•Dear girl on the LA quad screaming "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT EAGLE RANTS ARE?!?!?!", While I understand the tragedy of that situation, your reaction may be a bit over the top. Sincerely, I can hear you from the third floor, and my window is closed.
•@100lb girls in gym--why bother? your knees get enough exercise anyways. -Power to the Big People
•"If you ban bottle water, ***than company’s like Dasani lose profit,***than they fire workers, ***than unemployment goes up. Congrats!" (***Then…) I don't necessarily agree with your argument. Companies like Coca-Cola Co. (Dasani) and Pepsi-Co (Aquafina) will do fine even if AU bans bottled water. Capitalist ideology backed by microeconomics is not my argument. My argument FOR bottled water is (if the ban passes) not being able to have clean bottled water from a clean bottle that I don’t have to use over and over again. I can still recycle. But reusing a water bottle (plastic/metal) creates bacteria and viruses.
•@Wannabe Anne Boleyn: I'm not Nick Rangos, but I'm pretty sure he'd never behead anyone... maybe be the Isabella to his Ferdinand? - History WONK [Editor’s note: Be second cousins?]
•@"If you ban bottle water, than company’s like dasani lose profit, than they fire workers, than unemployment goes up. Congrats!" it is THEN, not THAN. THAN is used in comparison, as in greater THAN or less THAN
•I will not sign a petition for a tobacco free campus. That would mean no more hookah, chewing tobacco, or tobacco pipes, which are healthier than cigarettes. If you're goal is to increase the quality of air around campus, first petition to get the smells eradicated in the dorm halls and other buildings around campus. Those air particles have gotten to and messed with your heads. Also, in light of overpopulation concerns, lung cancer kills people. Yes its sad, but I'd rather have people die of poor decisions than have people killed because of overpopulation (No genocide/holocaust ? ).
•I didn't know it was possible to hate myself so much.
•"The student health center is ridiculous. I go there looking for some medical advice beyond WebMD, and I am told that the next available slot is five hours later. Here’s the best part, the waiting room was EMPTY!" I don't even bother. Go to a private practice off campus. Until they perfect the socialist medicinal way, there will always be long "soup lines" to get treatment at the health center. Even if they are non-existent lines.
•someone quoted George Bernard Shaw in yesterday's rants, so i'm going to quote my favorite George: "The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”
•"Dear person next door, Stop singing horrifically off key. I do not care to hear your renditions of 70’s music. I wish for peace and quiet in my own room while I type this essay. It’s bad enough my space bar is stuck. Signed, Your pissed off neighbor" Dear Pissed Off Neighbor, Sorry you think my singing is "Slightly Out Of Tune". I'd be more than willing to stop singing. Just knock on my door and talk to me. Signed, Your happy go lucky, "just ask me to stop" Neighbor
•I just want to punch everyone of you in the face who looks at me the wrong way. Don't piss me off. I've just had about enough of this damn university.
•If you and your friend must argue about whether or not you are a biddie, then yes, yes indeed, you are a biddie.
•What was the best thing before sliced bread?
•I'm a hypochondriac.
•I know this may come as a shock to contrarian lemmings like you, but Dasani's gonna be fine if one university stops buying from them.
•Dear 4 all nighters: if you are who i think you are, i have no sympathy because your priorities are f***ed up
•Can we dump Blackboard now? Moodle is free and open source, Blackboard is expensive, always breaking, and has a terrible interface. Please.
•"If you ban bottle water, than company’s like dasani lose profit, than they fire workers, than unemployment goes up. Congrats!" oh my god use the word 'than' incorrectly one more time, i dare you.
•ummm how was my rant putting the text of Aragorn's speech at the black gate into biddie terminology not published?! it was brilliant if i do say so myself.
•I'm an SPA Leadership student who agrees with my peers' eagle rants but wishes they would phrase them more eloquently and with better diction.
•I don't understand why people copy down class powerpoint lectures word for word if they'll be posted on blackboard later. Such a waste of time. Listen maybe
•No one really has that much homework that they need to pull four all nighters. I work part time and have class full time and can still get all my stuff done by 11pm. Stop procrastinating and get some sleep!
•I can't wait until we can stop being abroad and start being together.
•Am I the only one who doesnt know what the hell this (apparently cultish) "SPA Leadership" is?
•I'd like you to meet my girlfriend... wait, I mean _ _ _ _. But really, she's my girlfriend. I just get proud of her so I call her my girlfriend - but she is her own person
•You know what I hate? I hate it when you work so hard to become the person that you've always wanted to become, and then it gets you no where. You have a large quantity of friends, but when it comes down to the truth, you're loud, big, annoying, and in the end you have no one, and have a hard time having casual good life fun with the other sex. Can't people just be intimiate because you genuinely enjoy each other? I think EVERYONE should think about this.
•To the person complaining about wanting time and a half on tests: You know you don't get "time and a half" in the real world right?
•@fat girl at the gym; I applaud your quest to be healthy. But if skinny girls bother you that much, maybe you should get a kinect and play sports video games for your work out. Just sayin.
•Zetus lapetus, I'm a senior. WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN?!
•Why do I have to literally spell out 10 different ways for my boyfriend things that should be perfectly obvious. WHY DO GUYS HAVE ZERO INTUITION?! Grrr. Example : If I mentioned 15 times that I want to go out to dinner this weekend and you never say no to the idea, you can't just tell me right before I was planing on us leaving that you can't go.
•Yes, I read Parenting Magazine during class. No, I am not pregnant. I just like the idea of being a mom in the near future (after I'm done with school) and reading articles about babies is my escape when class is boring. Stop giving me judgmental looks.
•Uggghhh yet another trashy installment of Twilight comes out tonight. If anyone mentions in class tomorrow that they went to the midnight showing, I'm seriously going to shove their fandom down their sparkly throats.
•@Editor with the Tudor History facts: Marry me? I love a man who knows his Henry VIII. And if you're a girl, let's be friends. [Editor’s note: Def not a man. Let’s be friends.]
•Word on the Quad is that there's been a lot of SG-Cest this semester!!
•HA! I know you wrote that. Well done.
•I can't stop napping randomly around campus. Energy, where did you go??
•Dear Person That Steals Our Markers, We understand that we're awesome but if you keep constantly stealing our whiteboard markers, things might get ugly. Sincerely, The Marker Avengers (A3S)
•And loneliness will hurt you if you can't get through the niiiiight.
•Kudos to the AU shuttles! You seem to have made an attempt at staggering the buses, much to my delight.
•I rant so much I should put it on my resume.
•Lalala, I'm not listening. Go away, paper. Go away. SHOO! I SAID, GIT!
•I could understand it when you were trying to find out if I was a nice Jewish girl. I was slightly annoyed by how quickly your interest dimmed when you realized I'm not Jewish. But I'm happy we're now back to being friends.
•Nothing would make me happier right now than a bagel with cream cheese. Why must I have food allergies?
•Dear "Why don’t people want to live on campus?" I would love to live on campus. Unfortunately I got a number in the 1000s in the campus room lottery. P.S. Who lives somewhere with a backyard? I can barely afford my tiny apartment.
•If you don't like the music on WVAU why don't you join? It's run by students. Maybe "hipsters" are the only ones motivated to share their own music.
•I agree with the person who ranted about Katzen. I'm tired of SIS luncheons being held there. Did they build a beautiful new building for that?
•Give me rampant intellectualism as a coping mechanism. - Chuck Palahniuk
•painting parking spot lines. right outside my window. with a really loud machine. at 12:30 in the freaking A.M. GOOD ONE, AU!
•I'm too broke to go home for Christmas. No, I don't want to feed your damn animals for free. Stop asking me to do favors for you..I will obviously be too busy drinking away the holidays to care.
•I will not let myself fall in love with you. I will not let myself fall in love with you. I will not let myself fall in love with you...crap...I think I've fallen in love with you
•Dear Dav guy who made my coffee on Tuesday, you are super cute. Are you single? :)
•HELLO, MY NAME IS ELDER GREEN. DID YOU KNOW THAT JESUS LIVED HERE IN THE USA? YOU CAN READ ALL ABOUT IT NOW, IN THIS NIFTY BOOK - IT'S FREE - NO YOU DON'T HAVE TO PAY.
•And I believe that ancient Jews built boats and sailed to America!
•Any Jewish girls out there who want to date a gentile?
•Ron Paul r3VOLution!
•@fatgirlatthegym. We all have to wait to use the machines. Being fat has nothing to do with it.
•I wish Justin Bieber had been the father. :[
•do us all a favor and keep your random factoids to yourself. they don't contribute to our learning at all and EVERYONE else in the class knows you're just sucking up to the professor... Sincerely, Trying to learn something useful
•Seriously guys, what's the big deal about water bottles? Just get a reusable water bottle, it's better for the environment. Or do you hate nature or something?
•Don't be hating on sax man. Sax man is pretty cool. He plays sax and don't afraid of nothing.
•Dear person next door, I never claimed to be a good singer. However, I like to sing. It is a hobby of mine, and it perks up my day. No, I will not stop singing. Might I suggest the library if you are trying to write a paper? Signed, The Doors are 60s Music Anyway
•From a former spleader: Trust me, little spleaders, you can do amazing things all on your own! AND you can do these things without being graded! All the stress from SPA Leadership is not worth it. It was such a freeing moment when I chose to leave the program.
•Dear Roommate, I like you, but I don't like your hippy, pseudo boyfriend. Please stop bringing him to our room without letting me know. I hate walking in the room while you two are doing god knows what. I don't just leave for no reason, I leave because you make it awkward. Thanks, Irritated Roommate
•All I really think about now is going home.. I can't wait for Holiday Break. I wish I was going home for Thanksgiving.3 I love you, mom. I love you, bros. See you in a month.
•This has not been a good week. So much homework, so much fighting, so much stress. I need a break! But I can't take that in my room...... #RoommateProblems.
•Re: "If you ban bottle water, than company’s like dasani lose profit, than they fire workers, than unemployment goes up. Congrats!" Wow, you must be an econ major! Ever think twice about supporting corporations like Dasani? Ahem, I mean Coca-Cola. Check out thier water practices in Africa.
Rant here!
