• I miss all the artsy people at my high school. WHY OH WHY is everyone at this school so uncreative and career-driven?
• Anyone else see the Mario and Luigi duo running through Letts on Sunday?
• My least favorite thing about Eagle Rants is the editor's notes. I don't even know who you are, but your notes emanate annoyingness. EDITOR’S NOTE: Too bad.
• Please do not tell us to shut up at 11:30. Dude, this is college people actually don’t have a bedtime.
• Dear Smokers-??I don't care if you smoke. It's your choice. I don't choose to. Just can you please not stand right near the doorways to buildings (I'm looking at you guy who sits on the ledge outside MGC near the handicap door)? I know it's kinda inconvenient, but I'd really appreciate it.
• Person who thinks AU people suck-??Maybe you should get out of your dorm more. There are nice people here too. Just go find them and stop complaining about it.
• I hate it when people toss around words they don't understand to try to sound smart! It makes absolutely no sense, and we are all dumber for having heard it. You know who you are!
• Dear McDowell smokers,?You guys need to stop being such loserly jerks. Or more water balloons will be coming your way.
• I sick of these mother@#$!$$# rats, on this mother@#%#@#% campus!
• To whoever stole my laptop and $120 out of my locker in the men's locker room at the Jacobs Fitness Center on Monday between 1 and 3 p.m., to quote Liam Neeson: “What I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you." You left finger prints all over my wallet. I am going to find you. Bet on that.
• I'm 18 years old and am pretty sure I have arthritis. I blame having to do homework for six hours straight every other day.
• you,?I wish you'd believe that I see the good in you.??Me. • There was a really hot guy next to me at the rally ... if only he weren't part of the group holding a bunch of baby dolls covered in red paint screaming about pro-life.
• cute boy,?You like me. I like you. Break up with your girlfriend already!
• Why has the "Rant here" box been periodically disappearing over the last few weeks??? It's reaally reallyy annoying when you have to go back to a previous eagle rant to submit a rant.
• Work work work...?I should have stayed at a state school.
• To all the ranting smokers:??I'm sure many of you are nice, free-thinking, non-degenerates, but when one of you sits next to me in a class, reeking of cigarettes, I'm fully within my right to be pissed. Outside, no one cares. Inside, you smell like crap.
• All I want to do in life is listen to music and dance. Hipsta style.
• I'm going to make a call of judgment and say someone ranted about me. Thanks.??P.S. Kissing ass will get you far.
• To my "friend" who hooked up with the guy I was talking to all night ...Thanks!
• There is a deeper circle of hell for the alumni who hang up on Phonathon callers
• Girls of AU: We all look, act and dress the same. We are not special. So don't think you can act like hot shiz just because your dad thinks your God's gift to the world or because you have an attractive lax-bro of a boyfriend. Get over yourself. You are typical.
• AU should think about starting up some sort of Mental Health Advocacy Group or Discussion sort of thing or something because frankly, the counseling center offers little to no resources to students and I think it would help out a lot of students.
• AU,?Stop sucking the soul out of me. I'm gunna need to rely on it later when I can't get a job or pay for anything, etc. You do a great job of making us feel important when we first get here and then boom — nobody gives a crap about you anymore. And I don't want to hear about reaching out to others and joining clubs/groups. It's not that easy.?-Me.
• As I was sitting in my room one lovely Tuesday evening, I heard a familiar sound erupting from the street. It was a transport! Then it dawned on me ... "wonk" is the exact sound the ambulances make. And boy, does AU have tons of transport wonks.
• Next time just reject me outright instead of agreeing to go on two dates with me before telling me you just want to be friends. Two nights and $32.50 wasted.
• Now not only are the dorms too hot, but my office is too ... WHY DO YOU HAUNT ME, HOUSING AND DINING?
• Rants, you missed Thursday, and then give us a short, unsatisfying list of rants? Work with me here!
• People need to stop using the handicap doors in MGC unless you a) have something in your hand(s) that prevents you from opening said doors or b) are handicapped. Stop being lazy and use your arms. It's not that hard.??P.S. If you are going to use the handicapped doors, don't kick or slam the damn thing that opens them.
• In addition to rats at AU, we can also add having mice on campus. I constantly see my little mouse friend in MGC when I get here in the mornings and he hasn't gotten exterminated yet. I think he needs a name. Suggestions?
• I love the earth just as much as the next person, but there's a point where turning my lights off while I'm reading is a LIL RIDICULOUS! Thanks, random kid who doesn’t even live on my floor!
• Financial Aid at this school is terrible.
• I too, loved the Shakespearean rant, and I hope there are some more soon. My Shakespeare prof loved it!
• Roommate, seriously this loud eating thing is ridiculous. Now you are eating pudding or something and it just sounds like u are repeatedly putting your hand in a jar of vaseline.
• I love men. I am a female. I need more lovin. Holler!
• Dear Guy in my History Class,?STFU FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. I am so sick of your voice it's kinda ridiculous. Stop acting like you know everything and quit interrupting our professor like an inconsiderate jerk. Also, every time you talk it's like nails on a chalkboard.??Sincerely,?An Annoyed as Hell Classmate
• I hate group projects in college. Why do professors think it's the greatest thing since sliced bread? Apparently they don't know how difficult it is for a group of college kids with difficult schedules to meet up is. Let me handle my own grade please.
• I hate how AU screwed me over with housing. I hate how my supposed friend who said she would be my roommate screwed me over by getting a place to live and then not tell me. I hate the fact that I found out about it via Facebook. And I hate being away from everything because I have to live at home.
• I think AU Debate got $1 for every student who is not a member and has never heard of them on campus. Which means they got $0.
• Ok, I know we just had a big rally for reasonable political discourse but I'm still PRETTY DAMN SURE that Tom Smith is Hitler.
• Bikes on sidewalks are going to be the death of me, or some slower, deafer soul who does not have the time or strength to leap out of their way.??I have had so many near misses I have developed bike/sidewalk PTSD, and jump onto the grass at every little sound.??Seriously, you are a public health hazard. Either put on a helmet and brave the roads, or use your feet like everyone else.
• Thank you AU STAND for writing that letter to the editor about Student for Life and their poster likening Abortion to Genocide. I was so offended by it. They should seriously issues a public apology. Especially to the students that go here, like me, who have survived through genocides.
• I need more caffeine and less bullcrap from my professors.
• Guy standing in front of me on the shuttle: Your body odor is outrageous.
• I like the irony of "constitutional experts" who think socialism is unconstitutional and who simultaneously use the U.S. postal service to send out campaign literature.
• I finally know what it is like to be addicted to drugs. You see, I hate working at the Phonathon, but I really need the money. Everyday I tell myself I am going to quit, but I just can’t. Phonathon, you ruin my life.
• To the moron ranting against our basketball team, we're ranked as the pre-season favorites to win the Patriot League because we're returning all of our starters (and bench players) from last season, we're bringing in two touted recruits who will likely get some playing time AND we've added two transfer players from SEC programs with Troy Brewer and Charles Hinkle. If you don't know anything then don't say anything.
• The ENTIRE FREAKING CAMPUS must be on eaglenet right now. Silly election results are interrupting my much needed DWTS time.??RANT.
• WHY DOST EAGLENET SUCKETH SO MUCH?
• I wish I worked at the Phonathon so I could write Eagle Rants all day. Clearly its all they do there.
• TDR NEEDS NUTELLA!
• If you really want me to hate you more continue typing in all lower case letters and oh yeah never ever use punctuation
• Sometimes I search my own name on CollegeACB. There's always a mixture of disappointment and relief when it yields no results.
• It would be super awesome if the printer in Leonard Hall could work just once. Just once, is all I'm asking. That would be super awesome.
• Maybe I would stop playing Dolphin Olympics if I weren't SO FREAKING GOOD AT IT
• @"Dunkin Donuts needs to come to campus. Forget free trade."- I have been thinking the same for the last 4 years!
• If you didn't go to the super art fight you missed out. Thanks Design Club for planning a really awesome event!
• Please please please please please bring back the comment section!
• The Leonard 7 lounge is beginning to smell as disgusting as McDowell. Seriously, did someone vomit in the air conditioning?
• Long distance relationships suck. It's killing my mood, my grades, and I don't remember being this horny ever. Why can't the love of my life live in the same city with me?
• Whoever said that college was supposed to be so much more fun than high school obviously didn't have friends in high school. I miss my old life.
• I wonder how long it's gonna take for me to start believing the crap I tell alumni to get them to donate during Phonathon. I just get paid extra for how good of a liar I am.
• Props to whoever put up all those fliers about how much it costs to go to AU, how much the WONK campaign cost, and how all people don't like AU. They were effective and you seriously got them up quicker than I could blink. HIGH FIVE.
• All of you "political" AU students who didn't vote on Tuesday suck. You don't know how badly I wish I could vote, but I'm not a citizen and can't afford to pay for that shit right now and you all are wasting your votes. On the other hand, all of y'all that did absentee ballots and voted in D.C. are awesome. Good job executing your right to vote. =]
• Just because you're a gay man does not give you the right to touch my ass or my chest because I'm a girl. I don't care if it doesn't do anything for you, it makes me feel violated. Back off bro.
• Can't it be May already?
• I don't understand all of these people that are not wearing jackets and then spend all of their time bitching about how cold it is outside. You're wearing a Hollister T-shirt in 40 degree weather, what were you expecting? Idiot.
• I miss having sex with my boyfriend. Long distance blows.
• Anti-life moderates: thumbs down.??Pro-choice moderates: thumbs up.
• I'm all about free speech, I just wish anti-choice people didn't have voices.
• I love not having a roommate. Especially ones that eat my food and take my crap and then lie about it. Thank you Housing and Dining for processing that room change request so quickly. FTW.
• My professors partied more than I did over Halloween. I am so embarrassed.
• Dearest people of the quiet floor in the library. It's called a quiet floor. So when you decide to make that phone call, walking all around the QUIET FLOOR kinda disturbs my stuff that's actually important. Twice in one week. Really people.
• STOP BREATHING SO LOUDLY!
• Really, Student Health Center? Really? $190 for STD testing? 190 DOLLARS! I could buy a damn iPod instead of figuring out if Fratboy Phill was carrying! Priorities man, priorities.
• You know you go to AU when you open your cross cultural communications book to see a bunch of notes in Chinese.??You know you go to AU when you're at a party and see two people drunkenly shouting about whether or not Obama is a socialist.??You know you go to AU when you see students studying on their laptops in TDR.??You know you go to AU when the kosher meals are known to be better than anything else.
• Dear Housing and Dining,??Is blowing and bagging the dead fall leaves REALLY necessary? Not only is it a waste of energy and manpower, but decomposing leaves are actually GOOD for the environment! They protect the soil from erosion and provide valuable nutrients-- so you might even save on synthetic fertilizer.??Plus... it's really noisy!!??And if you MUST blow them off the grass... at least leave them in a pile for long enough for me to jump in it!!
• College is lonely.
• Visiting friends at other schools makes me appreciate how nice everything is here.
• Eagle raves > eagle rants?Keep things positive, people!
• Learning multiple foreign languages is totally screwing up my English. Writing a paper in another language and then writing a paper in English immediately thereafter results in professors asking you WTF is up with all of your verbs being in strange places. In addition, I have to constantly check to make sure I'm using the correct prepositions.?Maybe I'm just trying too hard this semester ... at the weekend, should I a party make in order to it about forget.
• Dear Eagle,??Please insert sudoku, word searches, etc in your online and print edition.??Love,??Bored Student
• I demand fancier toilet paper!
• I'm sick of all these rants about how hot it is in the dorms. My apartment is freezing :(
• Why are all the guys I’ve liked named Danny? And why do they always end up being Danny Dirtbag or Danny Dumbass? Can't I just find a Daniel Craig and call it good?
• Dear all non-athletes on the third floor from 6 - 11 p.m. on weekdays,?Us athletes have study hall. Don't tell us to shush if you want us to be quiet. Go to the second floor. It's the quiet floor for a reason. The third floor is the courtesy floor. None of us really want to be in study hall, but since we have to, we might as well make it a little fun and enjoy each others company. To end my rant, stop complaining and go to the second floor.?From,?Annoyed Athlete
• Single girl looking for male or female to have one night cuddle stand with. No sex, just cuddling.
• Seriously roomie, when my friends leave me whiteboard notes, please don’t immediately erase them so I don't even get to see them. We all know you live in the room. There's no need to erase my friends' funny notes ... and write your name in place of them.
• The orchestra director did not receive tenure and even with all the students to back him up and community members the University will not listen. I thought this was OUR education. Didn't the president already go to AU? It’s our turn now... why can't we get what we want? Is my tuition not worth enough?
• To the person who applied to 32 jobs - go to the Career Center on 5th floor of Butler. It's one of the top 15 in the country, so use it!
• Dear Friend,?Remember when we stayed up too late on a weeknight and sat by the vending machines talking? And then we both woke up right when our classes started? Good times.
• WVAU is out of control blazin a trail for online radio.
Rant here!