• Can't believe I have to keep saying this but: LADIES, LEARN HOW TO FLUSH A TOILET. I encounter un-flushed stalls at least once a day, which is way, way too often.
• Hey Eagle, remember that time that Pi Kapp threw a historic philanthropic event benefiting wounded veterans and people with disabilities? No? That's because you didn't cover it.
• I'm way cooler than 97 percent of this school. And I'm not that cool.
• The Gen Ed program is a joke. I don't want to pay $50,000 a year for a bunch of classes I don't even want to take. It's my money, LET ME CHOOSE HOW TO SPEND IT!!!!!
• The stairwell leading up from TDR is yet another example of AU slobbiness - the floor and the quad are not your personal trashcans so please don't drop your mint wrappers wherever you please.
• Hey people posting countdowns to summer on your Facebook statuses ... yes, I love summer, too, but those numbers remind me I have n days to finish everything including my capstone so quick giving me small heart attacks. Kthx.
• Dear professors, Please learn how to post grades on Blackboard. I do not enjoy wasting my and your time by concocting a passable excuse to come to office hours, wait in line at office hours, and finally casually mention the last test - all to simply ask you in a most unnecessarily circuitous way what my damn grade is. Most sincerely, every AU student ever
• I'm personally tired of hearing about Alex Knepper. I can't respect someone who writes articles that no one can understand because they're so swamped with incorrectly used, unnecessarily large words just for self-aggrandizement and attention. The only article I've ever read by him was his most recent, and let me tell you, I would not have looked twice at that poorly-written slop if it hadn't been so hyped up. Alex Knepper, I don't know you, but I think you should get over yourself :)
• There is so much sexual tension between us it's ridiculous. I know you feel it too, and we both know we can't do anything about it anymore!!!! Ugh.
• Why is my boyfriend never around? Oh yeah, he's pledging a fraternity. I want him back, please.
• I'm tired of all of the self-important Greeks.
• Okay, SERIOUSLY. What is up with all of the girls with electric toothbrushes who spend legit 10 minutes or longer brushing their teeth? What is WRONG with you all? You're supposed to brush your teeth for about two to three minutes. 10 minutes is way too long to stand there looking like an idiot with the brush in your mouth. Why does anyone need an electric toothbrush anyway? They are so unnecessary!!!!
• Why have I never realized the hotness of tall girls? Those legs...
• You are a BFD. Yeah, I just Biden-ed you.
• Smokers .... please throw away your cig butts ... just because you're free to smoke, doesn't mean your free to trash the front of MGC and the LA Quad ... what if everybody threw their trash out on the front step? Thanks.
• Screw the lack of legitimacy in this school. It's always "we feel this" and "we feel that." I've got an idea... maybe use the fact that this a school known for POLITICAL SCIENCE and use logical reasoning skills - thus meaning you should go by FACTS. Assholes. Love, a law and society major who doesn't know where is $40k is going
• My 12 fans suited me very well in the heat crisis of 2010. Also, glad I had to turn the key in my own room to turn on my air conditioning. God, I can't wait to move off-campus.
• Dear Charlie, I think you should make a special "Editor's Rant." You know, where you post about your cat or your calves or how you can't grow a beard or something. EDITOR'S RANT: My cat is sooo cute! And what about my calves?
• Keep the rants if they help your traffic, pitch them if they don't. EDITOR'S NOTE: They help traffic.
• We should be able to rant in pictorial form.
• It's sick. Unhealthy. Driving me crazy. Stupid, romantic-comedy craziness. But it's real. It's you. And I hate it. MAKE IT STOP so I can resume my life!
• You should definitely publish rants more often!!!
• I am finally happy with how I look. I am hot, and damn proud. Insecure no more :)
Rant here!
