• The library needs more electrical outlets
• The fourth drink instinct is taking over.
• wait, to the Regina ranter: I didn't even know "Dance Anthem of the 80s" EXISTED as a song. but it is the best. eagle rants has finally improved my quality of life. [Editor’s Note: That makes one of us]
• @"Why are there so many scrawny white boys," My boyfriend needs Magnums. Guess you just don't know where to look.
• you suck editor!
• You suck editor and those who defend the editor!!!
• Dear Editor, I feel like you get a lot of crap. You're just living your life, man/lady. Thank you for putting them up at all. :) Love, Your Secret Fangirl
• @ Straight girl with crush on another girl in her psych class: What psych class are you in?
• I hate when drunk people think you're judging them just because you're sober. No, group in the Berks who struck a pose when the elevator opened on my floor, I wasn't being judgmental, I was just pleasantly surprised at 5am
• why isn't ed sheeran in my bed
• @where are the lesbian posts. I don't know, and I want to. I don't understand how there are so many gay guys here and yet seemingly so few lesbians.
• @dramaqueen Actually, I think you are my dear. And I know I'm not a psycho cuz you told me last year you didn't like me when you were drunk. You made it clear you hated me before I even really knew who you were. You have a problem with me for no reason at all. Either that or you just have a stick up your a**. Personally, I think both.
• the average penis size of a US citizen is 5.1 inches... I'm confused because no one has measured my penis and I am certain it'd counterbalance the sizes of those not as well-endowed as me #confidentrant... but in the end, size doesn't matter, am I right?
• I totally forgot about that time we made out and then you never called me. except NOW I SEE YOU EVERYWHERE. and mostly I can't believe I ever made out with you?
• @ There's scientifically three races - No. No, you are wrong. Stop. Breathe. Okay. Humans are ~99% alike, no matter who they are. The only differences are phenotypic ones - hair texture, skin color, eye shape, etc. You say there's three races - what does that even mean? What's a 'race?' how are the boundaries so strict that there can be only three? Race is a construct thought up by humans, often to justify the prejudice and oppression of others. Take an anthropology class, honey. Anyone else's thoughts?
• And show me a "current" science textbook that says that there are, without a doubt, only three races. Bl
• @Arrested Perfect! We'll have frozen bananas dipped in chocolate, and juice. Unlimited juice. This party's going to be off the hook! Club activities will include fundraising for TBA.
• Yo, shout out to the photo LA's this weekend. Clutch.
• @looking for guys who aren't looking for biddies: since im not going to put my address on Eagle Rants, how about I say "here" the Tavern on Wednesday at 3pm?
• Please don't feed the troll, please don't feed the troll, please don't feed the troll
• AHHH...The Sean Connery of economics IRKS me!
• raising my hand for the gay-girls-who-like-buffy-and-cuddling roll call. i was going to write this paper after i got home from work tonight but then i accidentally started watching season six. oooooops.
• So........weirdness achieved this weekend. yeah?
• @want a tall boyfriend TAWIIL!
• I am done being ugly. I will fix myself.
• AU students arguing about the armed forces are a group of virgins arguing about what it's like to have sex. Obviously I'm not including student veterans or anyone from a military family. All the rest: your ignorance is showing.
• I will be strong, I will be FAITHFUL...
• Studying abroad in France has taught me something. I am not always an Eagle. From the divine food to the ubiquitous wine to the gorgeous women, this country beats the US all over the place. The people don't hate Americans, they hate ignorant tourists who make assumptions about their culture the same way we do. I miss and love AU, but while I'm living in France I am not an Eagle, but a Baguette.
• I wish the struggle bus took smart trip cards…: hahaha <3
• @"according to current science textbooks, there are only three races" ok, there is ONE race- the human race. end of story.
• that moment when you know your buttcrack is hangin out of your jeans but you just dont care...crack hills for the win
• Dear sleep, I miss you.
• Nothing exists save empty space and you. And you, are but a thought.
• Lol @ my roommate. Y u so salty?
• "I get by with a little help from my friends. Gonna try with a little help from my friends."
• For the love of God there has to be a girl out there that likes fluffy guys... We're great cuddlers.
• I like a bit of cushion for the pushin'... big girls you are beautiful
• Hi, kids. Here's an important message from your Uncle Bill: Don't buy drugs. Become a popstar and they GIVE you them for FREE!
• So any other The Classic Crime fans up for going to the show on Nov 5? I've got an extra ticket.
• Ahhh cold hands!
• chase me or you'll lose me
• Dan Auerbach's voice is wonderfully sexual. That is all.
• @flirting with other guys is not the way to get a proposal more quickly: Thanks for the criticism but you failed to offer a better alternative. Any suggestions?
• @plan B coupons: You are probably just trying to troll with this comment, but plan B is not something you should be using more than once. It is an extremely high dose of chemicals necessary for EMERGENCIES (hence emergency contraception). Have you heard of using birth control (pills, IUD, patch etc). Educate yourself and then go get a birth control prescription from the health center, so you won't need emergency contraception in the future.
• To the person who didn't want anyone to respond to the naval academy post: haha you lose
• My mom sees nothing wrong with being materialistic. I don't even know what to say to this. What do I say?
• What is the appeal of twitter over facebook? I don't get it. Fb can post status updates and pictures. Why get a twitter? -thinking of getting twitter but don't really understand the appeal
• @“Why are there so many scrawny white boys with small dicks at AU? Seriously. Not okay. So many disappointing nights…” Wow, slut much? Maybe if you judged a partner by their character rather than their penis size, you would actually have a healthy relationship instead of a string of meaningless hookups.
• This is crazy and wonderful and unbelievably exciting
• psych teacher, those skinny jeans are HAWT. make dem tighter.
• Have you seen the Katzen A/V office guys? All of them so damn hot.
• People should really stop hating on the guys at AU. I met my very awesome boyfriend here. Yes, he's white, yes, he's a little awkward, but he's super smart, great company, very kind, and is loads of fun. And I’ve met a handful of guys here that I would consider dating! Most of the guys on my hall are single, cute, and seem really sweet. Girls, you need to stop hating and try to make more friends. Guys are usually awkward and poorly dressed until they get a girlfriend to help them a little.
• I'm feeling a creative vacuum in my life. Back home I used to always to to open mic nights and hang out with the musicians and writers and lovely nerdy folk. Do we have anything super creative on campus that I haven't found yet?
• definitely saw a classmate on OKCupid during class today.
• Never change your hair. It's comfortable to sleep in.
• Saw something on Facebook about CAUS people walking back to the Berks/Avalon with students who live there so that the AU creeper won't strike. Screw that guy, good idea!
• dear new lady at salsa, please mess up my burrito more. thanks. I'm pretty sure its impossible to roll a burrito this poorly.
• TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY AND I LOVE EVERYTHING
• Ouch. I just fell and broke my pride on the steps of Hurst. The joys of being clumsy in flats without traction.
• I want to invest more time in myself spiritually, mentally, and physically. This whole drinking, hooking up, and feeling empty at the end bit isn't working out to well. I'm excited to try and change things up a bit. PS: STOP LOOKING FOR GIRLFRIENDS ON EAGLE RANTS PLS
• Life = no meaning
• We're just biding our time in an undisclosed location smoking cigars, watching football, and drinking beer. -Coalition of AU Straight Guys
• AAAAAAAAAAAASEXY LADAY
• What if he did? What if he didn't? What if the world were made of pudding?
• I became friends with someone last week and I think we're obsessed with each other.
• When you guys graduate, PLEASE BE KIND TO PHONATHON PEOPLE. WE ARE SUFFERING HERE. SUFFERING I SAY
• Dear Salsa Asian Lady -- You are so skimpy on chicken compared to the rest of Salsa workers it is SO annoying. Sincerely, HadABadDinnerBecauseofYou
• The blond girl with the gluten allergy and the black-rimmed glasses in my morning class is super cute. Just wanted to pay her the compliment!
• Colour me surprised when I found out there was a Salsa version of Coldplay's "Clocks."
• please stop telling me about how much you miss your ex girlfriend. It's been two months. get over it. it's getting really annoying now. Also I like you so it makes me sad
• I thirst for the rant
• It was the best sex of my life and I just want it to happen again. Work with me here.
• CANT STUDY HELP ME
• Eagle rants editor SUCKS. What is so difficult about posting the rants at a reasonable hour. If you can't handle that, you shouldn't have taken the job.
• France, In reference to the Germans, just because you've reached a nice cozy period with them now doesn't mean we can forget about the past. Seriously, throwing away all of that animosity just for some short-term enjoyment? I would question your decision-making, but we already knew that was faulty. And as far as alliances go, you may say you honor them, but we both know the truth here. - Italy P.S. Do you really want to talk about weapons? Yours only get used when they're thrown on the ground.
• I just want to go on a date with you.........
• Dear you: I'm sorry, I think I'm just going crazy. AHHHHHH! Someone get me outta here!
• @Where are all the wiccans on campus? This is why we can't have nice things!
• titties and balls
