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Wednesday, April 24, 2024
The Eagle

Eagle Rants Feb. 20

• @"I can’t even address the idiot that thinks drunk women should expect to get raped." Well I can't even address the idiots who think there are no dangers to binge drinking.

• @"Yea…Joe Dubois is the perfect husband….EXCEPT FOR THE PART WHERE HE DIES IN A PLANE CRASH!" I was only on season 4, but thanks for ruining it for me.

• Well...I was at mudbox and realized I didn't give any specific reference as to who I was...oops. You pick the time and place because I apparently suck at making plans. If you did show and I didn't see you, I apologize.

• @"@binge drinking leads to rape person:  you’re a damned fool.  Also, from one man to another (I assume you’re a man, because no woman I know would say that): you owe us all of your man cards" Actually I'm a girl. A girl tired of women being treated like immature children who are incapable of drinking responsibly and being accountable for their actions.

• Do AU girls fake orgasms often? I'm curious to know...

• To all loyal rant followers, I have just introduced two friends to the rants. I apologize if they rant incorrectly, remember, they are new at this. Welcome!!!!

• @Hey, AU: STOP FREAKING OUT ABOUT THE SNOW. Weather Channel says we’ll get an inch or less. Professors are cancelling classes for that? Calm down. I see no problem here.

• @"For the record, I also believe spending lots of money on designer purses and sparkly rocks is just as nutty as going to grad school without pursuing career in a field that requires a masters degree" Well great for you.  But unless you never plan on spending money on anything in life (plan on buying a house? You don’t NEED one you know. Plenty of people live in apartments or communes or homeless shelters), then GROW UP and stop telling other people how to spend their money.

• Practical solution for people arguing about date rape: Many colleges have orientation seminars about what consent means. They role play different situations. situations. Split up into discussion groups and talk about how to discuss the issue before the situation comes up. Etc. AU should implement this plan rather than just having a lecture on how “date rape is bad” and “be careful”. Women’s Initiative, get on this.

• @"For the record, I also believe spending lots of money on designer purses and sparkly rocks is just as nutty as going to grad school without pursuing career in a field that requires a masters degree" As a masters in philosophy student (but not the original ranter) I am offended by this rant. No job I have ever heard of “requires” a masters in philosophy. But I love philosophy and am pursuing further study in philosophy in order to broaden my mind and accomplish my academic goals. Stop criticizing other people’s goals.  It’s very narrow minded.

• @girl who wants to marry her boyfriend but worries they are too young: Why not just get engaged in college and then have a long engagements and get married when you are both done with college. Studies show that the best time to get married is between 23 and 25 because you are mature enough to know what you want from a partner and young enough to be able to compromise and mold your lifestyles without causing undue fighting. One people get set in their ways as adults, tiny things can become big arguments and it is hard to change.

• @"For the record, I also believe spending lots of money on designer purses and sparkly rocks is just as nutty as going to grad school without pursuing career in a field that requires a masters degree"  If you had it your way would we all become factory workers or majoring in business to someday manage the factory workers and their widgets.  The point of life is not work. Some people have higher callings. Expand your closed mind please.

• @ girl thinking she may lose her boyfriend before they can get married: Don’t let your soul mate get away because of bad timing. And don’t let the culture of the location you live in tell you that you are too young.

• I think I have an eating disorder, but I'm scared if I formally admit it then it will get even worse.

• @girl afraid of losing her bf: I'm scared of losing my bf before we get married too. I know he is the one. I just think I love him so much more than he loves me. And I don't know how to get him to express more love to me without me sounding like one of those clingy, pathetic girls. Guys, how do I keep my bf interested?!

• @"Perfect for you.": I love you. Next to Normal ftw.

• And I'm in pieces baby fix me, And just shake me til you wake me from this bad dream

• I want McDonald's back. I'm so tired of sandwiches. D:

• You've got some nerve, Henry, and I'm just all nerves. [Editor’s Note to all people named Henry: This is a lyric from a musical.]

• For every man-rant against women involving birth control, rape, or boob size: I've no idea why you are even allowed to have an opinion on these issues. We as women GAVE BIRTH to you. You would literally not be on this planet, with oxygen in your lungs, without a WOMAN. You have NO RIGHT to say some deranged comment like "expect to get raped". Your mother, whether dead or alive, should be ashamed to have you as a son. You utterly disgust me & you should be immortally indebted to the miracle that is the life a woman gave you.

• @average penis ranter: #tinypenis.

• do you think you have to love your family? cause i don't feel like i do.

• @perfect for you: You've got some nerve Henry and I'm just all nerves!

• @ "reading all the birth control problems makes me happy I am a guy and don’t have to worry about these things." if you ever plan on having sex with a girl and DON'T want kids at that time, you should probably be AT LEAST minimally concerned.

• I wish I had small boobs!

• I cannot get over how attractive you are.

• That moment when you go to your study lounge and there are no tables because they took them to Centennial so you go there and there just a guy with no shirt on staring at you....

• JUST KISS ME.

• small boobs FTW

• @Boys suck. Precisely why I'm a lesbian.

• @ 8 kids girl: actually, having more kids than you can comfortably financially support IS selfish. I hope you plan on waiting until you're financially successful and able to support 8 children before you have them. I also strongly urge you to consider adoption.

• @ "I want 8 kids." OP here: My boyfriend wants children. I don't want children. He has known this since we started dating. He says it's selfish of me to not want kids, and yet if I agreed to have a child (this is all YEARS down the road btw), he refuses to be its primary caregiver. Also, many females are shocked that I don't want kids and tell me it's not natural.

• Hey ranters: you guys are always complaining about your lovin' problems. the washington post has this thing called "date lab" (google it) where you can fill out a questionnaire about yourself (similar to one a dating site) and they set you up on a date with someone compatible. after, you give them a short account of the date. if we did this for you all, and then published your stories ANONYMOUSLY, would y'all be down? [Editor’s Note: #EagleRantsFromTheEagle]

• @To the guy wanting an easy girl. If you find a girl who is orange, than she is the answer to your problem.

• Hey you in SigEp with the name like a town in Mississippi, you're quite attractive. Own it!

• ALL THE MEMES SUCK! *RAGE FACE!*

• I know we can't date right now and I'm terrified that you'll lose interest by the time we're able to...

• I've been drinking since before you were born so if alcohol's the reason I'm here well I've news for you, bub: it's the only reason you're here too.

• HERMANO!

• I'm tired of random sex. I want someone to that I can talk to and cuddle and just be with. I want to matter to him, and then have sex with him on regular basis.

• I like you, I really do. We used to talk a lot last semester, but then we stopped talking. It was probably my fault, and I really want to message you again, but I fear it'll be awkward because we haven't talked in nearly 2 months.

• I keep forgetting that I'm trying to be a vegetarian.

• Normally I'm into guys that have terrible personalities, but right now I have the biggest crush on a guy that's actually nice. I think it's a good change of pace.

• Stop. Humming.

• I'm the original A cup ranter so I enjoyed reading people's responses. Definitely learning to be more confident about what I have. [Edtior’s Note: Get. It. Girl.]

• "I did IB in high school so I constantly had work to turn in" SHUT UP PLEASE

• I'm sorry I was blowing mt nose next to you but I really need to breath.

• Here comes the sun, doo doo doo doo...

• How about we all just try and be better people? Eh?

• I'm straight and I think my friend is straight but I really want to hook up with her.

• Met someone this weekend but I don;t know how to get in contact with them to hang out again >:<

• STOP eating full meals in class, wiping your hands on your jeans, and interjecting in the class discussion whatever you feel like it. Rude.

• Macro TA: please teach the class from now on.  I was actually able to follow the lecture today and walk out of class with a semi-coherent idea of what happened.

• AU rocks my socks off!

• Seems like the Republicans on campus are significantly less physically attractive than Democrats.

• @"what about single parents?": I doubt single parents would claim that they "have it all".

Rant here!



Section 202 host Gabrielle and friends go over some sports that aren’t in the sports media spotlight often, and review some sports based on their difficulty to play. 



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