MGM recently made the decision to scrub their “Red Dawn” remake of any references to the Chinese, presumably because they didn’t want to offend the rising superpower so that they can outsource Hollywood to Hong Kong permanently and reap the profits.
The word is that they are instead going to make North Koreans the bad guys. That’s right, that movie buff in the funny glasses is apparently powerful enough to subdue America in this alternate history.
This is just wrong. At least when the original “Red Dawn” was made, the Soviets were actually scary. But we needed to update the movie, so now any mildly villainous country will do. Except the Chinese.
So now that we’ve guaranteed that the first one-third of the new “Red Dawn” will be shown as a documentary in North Korean movie theaters, I thought I’d look back at a few other famous remakes, and to see how well they were updated for our modern palates.
“The Manchurian Candidate”
The 2004 remake of “The Manchurian Candidate” faced the same problem that the new “Red Dawn” remake now has to deal with. The 1962 version featured a Soviet plot to brain wash a soldier to become the ultimate assassin. The new version replaces the Soviets with a bland company performing corporate malfeasance to a treasonous degree.
The problem, of course, is this: in the ‘60s, the Soviets were a legitimate source of fear, and the kind of subversive actions in the film were within a stone’s throw of the popular imagination’s understanding of international espionage. The only people who think that a company would be interested in assassinating the president have Ralph Nader bumper stickers on their hybrids.
“Scarface”
Ah, the ‘80s — a time where cocaine subplots were common in children’s movie and there was a thin layer of white powder on every surface in America. The original “Scarface,” starring a character that no one could mistake for Al Capone, was as tame and trim as “The King’s Speech” in comparison to the loud, boisterous remake by Brian De Palma. Tony Montana is a ludicrous character, yet his wild gesticulations and borderline-offensive accent are what remain in viewers’ heads of the two movies.
Godzilla”
Japanese culture has always responded well to tragedy, which they unfortunately have seen much of. Last week’s tsunami was only the most recent in a number that have hit them in the last few centuries, but perhaps nothing could compare to the two atomic bombs dropped on the island in the closing days of World War II.
The public trauma that that event produced was the iconic monster Godzilla, a destructive force that tears down cities with disturbing ease. But when recreating this film for American audiences, there’s no shared collective experience to draw from. The result is a CGI monster tearing down New York, for no particular reason. Had it been released three years later, in the wake of 9/11, it might have had more context. In 1998, it was just a mess.
“Dawn of the Dead”
George Romero’s classic, along with “Night of the Living Dead,” invented the modern zombie. The slow, shambling flesh eater that everyone knows sprung from Romero’s brain, so it took a director as heavy-handed as Zach Snyder to muck it up. Snyder’s take ejects much of the political commentary in favor of mindless violence, sucking out much of the charm of the classic film.
“I am Legend”
“I am Legend” featured one of the most notorious rewrites of modern film. A complicated ending where the protagonist faces the fact that, from the monsters’ perspective, he is the titular legend in their culture.
It was an ending where the audience had to consider how each side of a conflict can see each other as the villain. Of course, test audiences hated having their view complicated. So, instead of recreating the ending of the novel and previous takes, Will Smith blew up some monsters. So, look forward to that.
“The Wicker Man”
The original “Wicker Man” is a moody horror film that keeps you guessing. The new “Wicker Man” features Nicolas Cage shouting things like “Killing me won’t bring back your GODDAMN HONEY!” and punching several women in the face. Best watched on a dare, or accompanied by an elaborate drinking game.
thescene@theeagleonline.com
