An AU student who did not wish to be named is the survivor of two sexual assaults allegedly perpetrated by fellow AU students. She agreed to share her stories with The Eagle, because she wants people to understand that rape is more common than many believe.
DATE RAPE
The first time she was sexually assaulted, she was at an off-campus fraternity party, and the other occurred on campus, she said. The first incident involved a vague acquaintance. The second involved a close friend.
The first month of her freshman year, the girl found herself at a fraternity party after her friends had already left. She had a lot to drink, she said, and she saw an older guy who was a familiar acquaintance.
“It was kind of like the situation [to which] people like Alex Knepper say, ‘It’s your fault,’” she said.
At first, she was unsure about whether it was rape or not.
“I do sort of wonder, was it rape?” she said. “It was really, really fast, and I really didn’t know what happened at the moment.”
But then she realized it had to be rape for two reasons. The first was that she was going in and out of consciousness when it happened.
“One ... I was completely incapacitated,” she said. “Two ... I was ripped apart. I was bleeding probably for three days,” she said.
The girl did not report the incident that occurred her freshman year because of all the stereotypical “freshman-gets-raped-at-a-frat-party” stories that she had heard before, she said. When she called a friend from home for support, he said, “If you’ve been drinking, I can’t help you,” she said.
“People say, ‘If you’ve been drinking, it’s your fault,’” she said.
She has never officially reported this rape case.
STRUGGLING WITH THE SYSTEM
The second rape occurred in an AU dorm and was allegedly done by a friend, who was her on-campus co-worker and fellow AU student.
This time, the AU student reported the rape case to the D.C. Metropolitan Police Department about four months after it happened.
During the time in between the rape and the report, “we pretty much acted like nothing happened,” the AU student said.
The man who allegedly raped her had been her closest male friend for months and was “probably one of the most ever-present people in [my] life,” she said.
So she tried to deal with it in the same way she dealt with her first rape - by putting it in the back of her mind. But it didn’t work.
“I didn’t like being around him. It made me sick to my stomach, but I ignored it,” she said.
When she finally reported the case to MPD, it took MPD six weeks to report it to AU’s Department of Public Safety and three months to provide her with an advocate, according to the student.
When she officially reported the rape on campus, she met with Human Resources to look at removing the alleged perpetrator from his job. But when he met with HR, he denied the rape incident. He did not lose his job because there was insufficient evidence for HR to fire him, she said.
He was suspended for a period, but she had to work with him for two months before he finally left the job, she said.
“This is one of the reasons I’m graduating early. AU, in general, is just a toxic environment” because it is so easy to run into the alleged perpetrators of her rapes and other people associated with the incidents.
Jennifer Dorsey, co-director of the Stopping Violence Against Women department of Women’s Initiative, said that it is common for survivors of sexual assault to be too intimidated by the process of reporting the case and pressing charges.
“It’s amazing — in a bad way — how many more [instances of sexual assault] happen [than are reported],” Dorsey said.
Victims are not required to report their cases, but AU needs a full-time advocate in order to help facilitate the process, Dorsey said.
This was true in the case of this survivor.
“When I needed help, I didn’t have it,” the rape survivor said.
But she has been able to move on and become stronger because of the process, she said.
The AU student is thinking about presenting a testimonial at the Women’s Initiative event, Take Back the Night.
“I think that’s the therapy I have left to do,” she said.
You can reach this staff writer at mfowler@theeagleonline.com.
Editor's Note: Because this is a sensitive topic, we will be closely moderating comments posted below. Should you find something offensive or inappropriate, please bring it to our attention at comments@theeagleonline.com.
