At AU, we are surrounded by thousands of similarly aged students, allowing for both sexual and nonsexual self-discovery. This unique environment, with its lack of curfew, few responsibilities and zero parental guidance, is an exciting prospect for most college students.
For many sea dogs, one of the trickiest parts about this whole "new experiences in college" thing can be figuring out just how to go about finding the perfect partner for that one-night stand, passionate love affair or strategically cultivated friendship with benefits.
There are many basic ways to meet potential partners. One strategy is to go to a public place and visually scout the person who immediately satisfies your animal sexual desires. The key here is that you don't know the person in question in advance and have little to no previous outside connection. We'll call this strategy the "red-light special."
This strategy is generally recommended for one-night stands or meaningless dalliances based on short-term mutual gratification. This strategy also has the advantage of little initial emotional risk, but the disadvantage of knowing nothing about your potential partner except their hair color (and name, if you've been paying attention).
First rule of this strategy: be yourself. A polling of college students by Leland Elliot and Cynthia Brantley in their book "Sex on Campus" shows that men and women rank personality as the quality they find most important in potential mates. In other words, it helps to actually talk to new people, because whether you believe it, being the silent person standing in the corner and nursing a drink doesn't make you a potential and desirable mate.
Be sure to shy away from pickup lines, as they have generally proven ineffective. Our one notable exception is, "Hi, I'm ____. How are you?" which is the best (and easiest!) method of getting into a conversation with whichever stranger you've worked up the nerve to chat with. Also, don't be afraid of failure. You may not hit it off with every captain, but you won't be made to walk the plank, so you've got little to lose.
Lastly, don't forget to smile and have open body language - nobody wants to talk to a sourpuss. Even if the party or event is too noisy to chat someone up without shouting at them, try making a weird face at them and smiling. Do they smile back? Return your silly look? If they do, chances are they would be interested in going someplace quieter to get to know you better.
Remember though, it can be dangerous to gallivant about the streets of D.C. with someone you don't know, so stay in public areas or write a note on a napkin asking if they and their friends are interested in moving to another location. Coffeehouse, a quieter club, a dorm common room - be creative. Once you have a name and a brief bio, the night is yours. Just remember, safety first. Two forms of protection always!
We'd love to hear from you! E-mail us your questions or concerns at insearchofbooty@gmail.com.
