A shaggy dog story is a sort of long-winded and ultimately anticlimactic tale, where the joke lies less in the punch line but more in the absurd and irrelevant events leading up to it (think "The Aristocrats"), The historic shaggy dog story ends with someone remarking that the talking shaggy dog, promised to appear throughout the story, isn't that shaggy at all. Get it? Me neither.
"The Shaggy Dog" is a 98-minute shaggy dog story, leaving the audience with an unsatisfying punch line that has something to do with animal rights. It's the latest in a string of sub-par remakes of classic Disney films, a take off of 1976's "The Shaggy D.A.," which was itself a sequel to 1959's "The Shaggy Dog." The fact that it's the remake of a sequel is the first caveat to moviegoers. The second is that it stars Tim Allen.
Everyone's favorite tool-man plays Dave Douglas, an assistant District Attorney who is prosecuting his daughter's social studies teacher, which causes tensions at home. The teacher allegedly burned down an animal testing facility, which, as it turns out, was trying to harness a 300-year-old Tibetan dog's DNA to extend human life by hundreds of years. Douglas' daughter steals the dog, the dog bites Douglas and the haphazard D.A. begins to turn into a sheepdog at inopportune times. It is only on all fours that Douglas finally realizes how to save his marriage and reconnect with his children.
This is Allen's sixth outing with Disney, with past gems like "Jungle 2 Jungle" and "The Santa Clause 2." It isn't that he's a bad actor. "Big Trouble" is worth renting, and "Home Improvement" was on the air for eight years, so someone must have been watching. He still has sitcom-worthy comedic timing and his man-to-canine metamorphoses result in some awkwardly nude situations worthy of "The Secret World of Alex Mack." The plot is fairly transparent and has all the jokes one would expect, from the befuddled dogcatcher to a "Who let the dogs out?" montage. The big surprise? Allen acts opposite Danny Glover, Robert Downey Jr. and Kristin Davis.
Ever since "Sex and the City" was cancelled in 2004, Davis' career has plummeted, as evident by her last film, "The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lava Girl 3-D." She clearly needs a new agent, but her performance in "The Shaggy Dog" is endearing. Downey and Glover are also diamonds in the rough of this formulaic film, though Glover seems a bit more embarrassed to be in a movie with a meditating sheepdog. Their performances hardly make the film watchable, but do serve as foils for the ridiculous events that further the plot. But in the end, "The Shaggy Dog" is just another shaggy dog story, and the punch line is that moviegoers paid $8 to see it.
Don't get roped into Disney's story, no matter how many talking dogs they promise you. In the end, the joke's on you.
