Remember those calendars they used to sell at the mall, where every month was a picture of a different puppy? Frank Marshall and Disney's latest, "Eight Below," is two full hours of that - on the big screen. What's being sold as a tale of adventure and friendship is lost in a sea of cute huskies rolling around in the snow.
"Eight Below" is inspired by a 1958 Japanese expedition dramatized in the 1983 film "Antarctica." Marshall's remake replaces the Japanese scientists with young, hip Americans. Cooper (Jason Biggs) and Jerry (Paul Walker) are just two regular dudes working at an Antarctic research base, but when geologist Davis McLaren (Bruce Greenwood) comes looking for a meteorite, the fragile party atmosphere is shattered. Jerry and his team of sled dogs lead McLaren on his search for a meteorite, not without a few run-ins with danger. But when a storm sets in, the scientists must evacuate their base, leaving the dogs behind.
What unfolds in the second half of the film are two different arcs: one of the dogs in their quest to survive the winter on their own, and another of a mopey Paul Walker toe-ing the ground, mourning the loss of his dogs. The real adventure - and the real acting for that matter - is with the dogs. Both stories aren't told well enough to invoke any emotional investment in the characters, but at least with the dogs there are some "aww" moments.
To keep the attention of America's attention span-challenged children, Marshall dramatizes the dogs' 180-day battle through cute-ness. Initially tethered to the base, the pups free themselves by fetching a flag that blows loose. One dog breaks its leg after trying to jump at the Aurora Borealis. And throughout it all, there is a pup-o-meter which chronicles how many days the little guys have been on their own.
Walker's side of the film is an endless montage of his chiseled face attempting to look distraught, as if he can't find the keys to his lowered Honda Civic. His scenes are tiring and emotionally empty, leaving the audience waiting for the puppies to come back on screen.
Where it fails as an adventure film, "Eight Below" works as a nature film. The scenes of the dogs alone in the ice are hauntingly emotive and, free from the talking animal complex of Disney past, have a silence appropriate to the massive glacial landscape. Free from the distraction of Paul Walker and the rest of the human cast, the dogs quickly become the stars of the film in their fight for survival. Besides being adorable, they adequately tell a story of hope, compassion and loss. Some of the most touching moments in the film come when the dogs mourn the death of one of their own.
"Eight Below" lies somewhere between "Snow Dogs" and "L'Ours," the classic speechless film of two bears fleeing hunters. Relying far too heavily on Walker's star status as a vehicle for the film, Marshall sacrifices what could have been a powerful story of animal survival and natural beauty. Instead, Walker stands awkwardly in the frame for half the film, not knowing what exactly to do, where his doggie co-stars could have better used the time looking adorable.
