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Everyone around me seems to have internships and big plans. How do I deal with feeling behind?
It’s only natural to compare yourself to others, especially at a hyper-competitive, hyper-political school like American University. However, it’s important to understand that everyone has a unique path. Recognizing this is the key to enjoying your college experience and avoiding the feeling that you are perpetually behind.
At the end of my freshman year, I spoke with many of my peers and felt overwhelmed hearing about the insane internships that awaited them. One friend would soon begin interning at a communications firm in New York City working with politicians on their platforms. Others would be interning with different think tanks in D.C. Even hearing about the variety of clubs and activities in which they would hold higher roles during their sophomore year overwhelmed me.
All of it was intense, and I was concerned about falling so far behind my peers, as they were set to achieve such great things. I was excited to go home and hang out with family and friends in Iowa, and I had a vague idea of the activities I wanted to continue in my sophomore year.
That gut-punch feeling that I wasn’t doing enough really ate at me during the first month of summer. I kept thinking: “What more do I need to be doing?” or “What will be the next thing that can set me apart?”
I brought my thoughts, feelings and concerns to my academic counselor, and he explained that this feeling is what is supposed to motivate you to do more. It is meant to guide you to the next step. He also made clear that all of my peers were feeling the same way, which was the most helpful advice of all.
Knowing that my peers were working hard at these wonderful internships, yet still felt the same, was almost comforting. It made me realize how much we all have in common and that we all struggle with our version of impostor syndrome.
Imposter syndrome is a feeling of self-doubt that tells you that you don’t deserve to be where you are. Feeling like you’re not doing enough is a form of imposter syndrome, because it means you are constantly chasing the next thing — scared of not reaching it. But I am here to tell you: you deserve to reach your goals, and you will.
Use the feeling of being behind to learn how you can continue to strive for your goals. Talk to the people who are already in those positions and ask how they got there. Remember, no one’s journey to the role they have is the same. I once met someone who served as a finance director for a U.S. House of Representatives race. He earned his undergraduate degree in film and then went on to run a successful campaign that the candidate won.
This feeling may never go away. Ask your parents. I’m sure they will tell you they have felt this way, or still do. The best thing you can do is learn how to use those feelings to motivate yourself and strive for your next great success!
Ritika Shroff is a junior in the School of Public Affairs and a columnist for The Eagle.
This article was edited by Quinn Volpe, Alana Parker and Walker Whalen. Copy editing done by Sabine Kanter-Huchting.
