This Saturday, April 2, is practically a national holiday.
Famed thespian, professor and all-around badass George Hamilton Feeny is celebrating his 84th year on the planet in his wildly infamous style.
Feeny’s birthday parties, or “Feeny Fiestas” as they’ve been dubbed in the press, have been the biggest ragers of the year. And he always brings the party in a whole new way.
There was last year’s epic dance party at his friend Diddy’s mansion in Miami, the year before when he held it at his private Tuscan villa and — probably the most notorious — his 81st, when he welcomed his old age at the Playboy mansion with close friend Hugh Hefner. It was at that party that Playboy bunnies wore the now infamous Feeny Bikinis (be warned — googling this is NSFW) and served Feeny Martinis (Four Loko, gin and two olives).
Feeny became a star when he was on the groundbreaking, documentary-style television show “Boy Meets World,” where he played himself, a teacher and principal at John Adams Junior and High School. The show followed him to a brief stint as a professor at Pennbrook University, but Feeny left after an amazing seven years, winning a slew of accolades and a coterie of ever-growing fans in the process.
After leaving the show, Feeny went all over the world, teaching English in many different countries and picking up an astounding five languages on the way (Swahili, Arabic, Russian, French and Italian, if you must know).
Even though he hasn’t graced the small screen in a few years, he’s left an impression on the big screen. It’s been rumored that the 2009 comedy hit, “The Hangover,” was based on a yet-unreleased memoir that Feeny had written a few years back.
In an interview with The Eagle, Feeny set aside all rumors once and for all, admitting that his bachelor party was essentially the plot of the film.
“But without the roofies,” Feeny said. “Definitely without the roofies. That shit is not cool.”
Though Feeny is now divorced, he’s a staple on the Hollywood social scene merely because of the arm candy he’s seen with. Swirling rumors and many a scandalous photo have linked him to starlets such as Scarlett Johannson, Mila Kunis and, unsurprisingly, mega babe Betty White, whom he fondly described as “a blast in a glass, to borrow a colloquial phrase from my girl Deena on ‘The Jersey Shore.’ ”
When asked how he keeps fit, especially at such an old age, Feeny’s answer is surprisingly youthful:
“I like to go running everyday with my friend Chuck [Norris]. We do a little boxing, a little jujitsu — but sometimes I have to take it easy on the old guy,” Feeny said, with a devilish grin.
With such a young spirit, Feeny’s birthday preparations this year are likely to top his past ones. The self-described dubstep enthusiast drops a few juicy tidbits, like that deejays Skrillex, Rusko and Bassnectar will all be sharing musical duties.
“I take music very seriously,” Feeny said. “I once didn’t speak to Mr. Matthews for a whole year, just because he pronounced deadmau5 wrong.”
Considering that in the past stars like Jay-Z, Halle Berry, the entire cast of “Jersey Shore,” Pee-Wee Herman, both Noel and Liam Gallagher (in the same room no less!), Megan Fox, Eric and Cory Matthews, Neil Kerwin (no relation) and the late, great, famed recluse J.D. Salinger have attended Feeny Fiestas, there’s no saying what Feeny’s birthday will hold this year. Viva la Feeny Feeny Fee-hee-heeny!
