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Tuesday, April 16, 2024
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Former Public Safety Director Takes Job in Iraq

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Former AU Public Safety chief Carleen Colson, who was fired by the University last November after students and parents complained about her over-aggressive response to the sexual attacks that were occurring on campus, was named chief of the Iraqi National Police Force in a ceremony here yesterday.

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Entire GA resigns to pursue lives!

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The entire membership of the General Assembly, AU's student-body legislature, resigned yesterday in order to pursue social lives. "I really started to think upon viewing [Student Confederation] President Rick Toolzerlli's farewell address on ATV. You know, the one where he called us all 'a band of surly tools,'" said Jane A.

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New SC Prez plans to study abroad

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Colon Hennae turned down the position of Student Confederation president to pursue an opportunity studying abroad at Oxford University. Hannae announced his decision yesterday on several napkins left on tables in the Marketplace that he will not be serving AU's student government, or the SC for that matter.

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Students look for jobs, internships at fair

Fifty percent of students who complete an internship decide that it is something they do not want to do, said Francine Blume, director of Experimental Education at AU. "It's not that it was a bad internship," she said. "But something about it made them realize they aren't interested in this particular field of work.


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Eagle's Nest to stop selling crack!!!

This week, University administrators made the unilateral decision to stop the sale of crack-cocaine at the Eagle's Nest, a popular spot for many students on campus. Additionally, the University has ruled that smoking crack within 10 yards of residence halls is a big no-no.


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Trump in talks to rename Ward

Media and real-estate mogul Donald Trump wants to buy the naming rights to the Ward Circle Building, according to Media Relations representative Della DeAngelopolis. Trump is currently in negotiations with AU's Board of Trustees and held a meeting yesterday to talk about donations.



Section 202 host Gabrielle and friends go over some sports that aren’t in the sports media spotlight often, and review some sports based on their difficulty to play. 



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