I’m pretty much convinced it’s the pop culture apocalypse. They’re making a 3D “Great Gatsby.” Mathew Weiner is fighting to keep advertising out of “Mad Men,” a show that is about advertising. Sidney Lumet died, and “The Dark Knight” sequel will be filmed in Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh! These are the end times. Which is nice, because it perfectly coincides with the end of my column and the end of three years of writing about pop-culture for The Eagle. It’s nice to go out at the end.

In keeping with a noble tradition of bringing you lists based on rumors and conjecture within the entertainment industry, here’s a fun one: crazy-young-man-turned-sad-old-man Bill Murray may be playing Franklin Delano Roosevelt. I will let that sink in. The guy whose arguably best role involved a longstanding feud with a gopher will play one of the most important figures in 20th century history.

MGM recently made the decision to scrub their “Red Dawn” remake of any references to the Chinese, presumably because they didn’t want to offend the rising superpower so that they can outsource Hollywood to Hong Kong permanently and reap the profits.

Detroit has officially decided that, bowing to pressure from a campaign of residents and outsiders, they will build a statue of Robocop in their fair city, thus ruining all the credibility the city built up with that Chrysler ad with Eminem. The metallic savior of the city, which in the film is portrayed as crumbling ruins (any joke here would be too easy), will be remembered forever as a reminder of what happens when a big corporation has too much power and tries to destroy your entire city (metaphor!).

The day after the Super Bowl, we all gather around the proverbial water cooler and talk about whether or not the game ruined Ben Roethlisberger’s career or how long Christina Aguilera deserves to stay in Guantanamo for messing up the national anthem (the correct answers: no, and, depends whether or not she gets a military tribunal). Or commercials, whatever. Groupon may have clinched this year’s title for most offensive ad, after they capitalized on the crisis in Tibet in order to sell us curry.

Hello all, and welcome to Listopia. This new column will be dedicated to looking at our current pop-culture fascinations and queries through the lens of the media that came before. In list form!

The Rat is clearly more evolved than us. While we huddle in our dorm rooms next to whatever bottle of liquor we still have stored for winter, desperately trying to avoid stepping out into the frozen tundra, they will somehow survive and thrive, coming out to meet us next spring with a hope that this season will bring a bountiful harvest of garbage.

Our guide to dodging questions from your family.

Want to explore the world of niche art without leaving campus? The Katzen Art Center has American, far-Eastern and alumni exhibits on display.

Running for public office is hard. We’ve had that idea pounded into us for a long time, and seen it in every recent election. It’s hard if you’re black, a woman or someone who thought it would be a good idea to make a sex tape with their mistress while seeking a party nomination. Heck, it’s just hard for everybody.

That’s why, when The Scene heard the news that a student would be running for the local neighborhood commission to make our voices heard (insert patriotic marching music here), we thought it might be a good idea to collect the best media representations of running for office. Future candidate, these might help ease some suffering in the coming fight.

Here in D.C., there are no shortages of volunteer opportunities. You can’t throw a stone without hitting a cause to support or a group in need of help. That doesn’t mean new non-profits aren’t welcome in a city full of them, especially one that may bring an outlet for pirate supplies.

Dave Eggers’ 826 project, which focuses on giving young children the opportunities to improve their reading comprehension and writing skills, combines a healthy sense of whimsy with the one-on-one attentions that produce great students. And now they have proper showing right here in the District with the new 826DC.

Who doesn’t love listening to students sing creative arrangements of your favorite hits without any back up instrumentation? At the A Cappella 2010 Preview concert last Friday, AU’s On a Sensual Note, Treble in Paradise and Dime-A-Dozen used powerful vocals and showmanship to remind us why we’re so fond of this college tradition.

Most media about D.C. focuses on Congress or the President, for the simple reason that those are the things that most people think about when they think of D.C. And admittedly, that is a lot of it. But some movies, TV shows and songs try to find their own angle, for better or for worse. Here are nine of the most notable depictions of Washington, D.C.

Coming to college can often serve as a sad excuse to give up your hobbies. Meeting new people, coping with a grossly-expanded reading schedule and timing your Terrace Dining Room trips to monopolize on fresh food leaves little time to pick up a guitar or work on your voice.

Finals week means one thing to Scene Staffers: summer is coming soon, and with it, new wonderful music! Our recommendations for your heat-wave playlist include a new appearance from Eminem, the third album from Sri Lankan artist M.I.A. and the deep, soulful vocals of Matt Berninger in The National.

Even though the weather gods that control D.C. have seemingly gone off their medications temporarily, it’s likely they’ll calm down soon and usher in that oppressive heat and distracting sunlight that outdoorsy people call “summer.” (EDITOR’S NOTE: This climate theory has yet to go up to peer review.) And though we don’t have to worry about ash clouds or earthquakes, sometimes enjoying the outside world can be boring. Here are our picks for entertainment that do a great job of explaining what summer is like, just short of stepping out your front door.

The members of Spinoza will prove more than practice makes perfect. This study group of musicians meets once a week to learn how to perfect their instruments. Spinoza’s Practice-a-thons promote dedication while raising support for the Sitar Arts Center, an organization that provides arts education to at-risk youth.

Modern art may need a facelift to get some popular appeal, but the Hirshhorn has a pretty good idea of how to pack people in to see some of their groundbreaking works. But the Hirshhorn After Hours, their semiannual party, was an event less about the art and more about the people who art seeks to affect.

It’s happened to all of us. You’re in your room and you think the door is locked. You’re finally getting into the groove and then, bam! Your mother, father or roommate busts into the room and everybody feels very, very embarrassed.

Though the concept of the mini-series has not achieved as much success in the United States as in other television venues, HBO continues to host new material in that category this spring. The Scene’s Michael W. Richardson gives readers the run-down on some of their latest offerings.

Reviews of two new records on the rack.

Great musicians aren’t supposed to go out in a blaze of transcendent glory. Bands and singers who break up or disappear at the peak of their careers when they can apparently go nowhere but up break the natural progression of musical careers. We expect to become disillusioned by our heroes — to be able to say that we loved them once before they fell back to our level.

One might consider it difficult to imagine that an influential band, active since the late ‘60s and counting among their fans a number of influential bands, producers and other celebrities could somehow remain obscure. But you probably still haven’t heard of The Residents. And they would likely prefer it that way.

Chances are, when you flip on your favorite sitcom or sketch comedy show, the people you’re watching and the people behind the scenes have some kind of formal comedy training. That doesn’t necessarily mean sitting in college lecture halls deconstructing what makes a joke funny. Often, it means an education from any number of comedy troupes around the country.

One of the most famous theaters in this respect is the Upright Citizens Brigade, whose traveling improv artists performed four shows at the Harman Center for the Arts on Friday and Saturday.

UCB gained their fame in the ‘90s when they produced some of their most famous names — Amy Poehler, Matt Walsh, Horatio Sanz, Rob Corddry and Ed Helms are…

J.D. Salinger, master of the short story and patron saint of disaffected teenagers, passed away last week at the age of 91. From the time he published the short story “A Perfect Day for Bananafish,” he was almost instantly added to the canon of American literature — a new, distinct voice that sought insight into the urban ennui of youth and the young at heart. He would go on to put out a body of work that was both incredibly brief and incredibly influential.

Writers have been rushing to praise him, calling him the most important American writer since Hemingway or even Mark Twain, and those men and women may have a case. Critic Louis Menand wrote in the…

Aziz Ansari
“Intimate Moments for a Sensual Evening”
(Comedy Central Records)
GRADE: B

Sounds like: an overly-caffeinated pop culture snark-fest.

Aziz Ansari has seen his stock rise dramatically in the comedy world over the last few years. After starting as an intern at the Onion, his sketch comedy troupe Human Giant became one of the few watchable scripted programs in MTV’s arsenal. His turn in NBC’s “Parks and Recreation” is stitch-inducing, as he steals each scene he shows up in. And his tiny role as a scathing parody of Dane Cook known as Raaaaaaaandy (the eight A’s are integral to the character) in Judd Apatow’s film “Funny People” ended up as a cult…

And so it was on this Martin Luther King, Jr. Day that some of D.C.’s popular and transcendent rap and hip-hop acts took the stage at the 9:30 club to raise money for the people of Haiti, who are still searching for the dead after a massive 7.0 earthquake outside the capital of Port-au-Prince.

We here at the Eagle are optimists. Sure, we have a cynical streak, but every year we’re just hoping that it’s going to be the best year ever — at least for the entertainment that will keep us distracted enough from our own lives. So in that spirit, here are a few of the films we’re most looking forward to losing ourselves in over the new year.