[Editor’s Note: I done goofed. I forgot to post rants yesterday and as it turns out some of you noticed. Sorry about that, I’ll try to be better from now on. Here are two days worth of rants.]
• I am proud to know that when my resume comes across a local employer’s desk in the very near future, the first thing that they’ll think about EDUCATION: AMERICAN UNIVERSITY is “Rape Apologist” and breast-feeding professor with a PhD from Berkeley.
• Thanks for censoring my rant, Eagle. Really love having my rights violated like that. I didn’t even break any of your “rules.” So sorry that what I had to say wasn’t in line with your views.
• Taste my sad Michael; taste my sad
• I think I get more pathetic by the day. I don’t know how to fix it.
• I think we need more rants that don’t directly mention professors and babies, this. The best I could do; Soemone on my floor the other day was watching Rent. WTF IS A SEASON OF LOVE? Can I use that in physics class as an amount of time? Like if I have to solve a probelm where someone drops a ball off a 600 foot tower and it’s accelerating at 9.80m/s squared, and I need to answer the amount of time, can I answer it in seasons of love?
• “@sex during ovulation: Have you heard of this thing called the birth control pill?
You’re ovulating away your finite number of eggs if you aren’t taking it. Just sayin”
• I’m too mentally fragile to read the million pages I have for homework right now.
• Re: “male bodied person”: Biddies can be guys too. Stop being sexist.
• Im not the OP but GOVT 105, GOVT 110, GOVT 130, and ANTH 215 are all gen eds. Why are you assuming everyone in the anthropology class (which is a gen ed) were anthropology majors. Your logic applies to probably one or two in Pine’s class of 40.
• American University Ranters. I am impressed. I was able to place a rant in Yesterdays rants (September 10th, 2012) that probably offended everyone I showed it too. It read “Have a happy Suicide Awareness Day and a happy 9/11!” Bravo American University. And here I thought you were all a bunch of butthurt f***ots who couldn’t take any sort of “offensive” joke. What would have amazed me even more is if someone jumped in and played in to the joke, as opposed to just attacking it.
• Don’t hate on frat parties. They can be a great time for people who don’t have sticks up their ass.
• “@ I did not hit her, it’s not true, it’s bulls$&*t, I did not hit her, I did not! Oh hi Mark.
Don’t touch me motherf&^%er.”
• Adrienne Pine didn’t want her story published, but because she wrote “Exposéing My Breasts” it’s now reached national news. Lesson: If you don’t want it published, don’t blog about it.
• “we go gangnam style
up and down the south side halls
don’t even go here”
• Let’s keep it real. Do any of you have babies? You feed babies when they are hungry. Babies don’t have the ability to wait until it’s convenient to be hungry, because their stomachs are so small. A newborn will take <2 oz. An older infant perhaps 4 oz. That's 1/6 to 1/3 of a can of soda. When that tiny space is empty, it needs to be filled. Grown people--and AU students are grown--need to deal.
• Tonight's the night. And it's going to happen, again and again. It has to happen. Nice night. Miami is a great town. I love the Cuban food. Pork sandwiches. My favorite. But I'm hungry for something different now.
None for you and ten for me,
all your lies won't set you free,
• BEFRIEND THE PEOPLE ON YOUR FLOOR. You'll be bumping into them for a year!
• PLEASE print the Adrienne Pine story! You don't even need to print her name but now, thanks to WaPo and Today and the fact that news spreads fast on a (relatively) small campus, everyone already knows who you're talking about! Look at the hole she dug herself into… self-righteousness gets no one anywhere.
• I kinda want to find the girl who said I was adorable on 9/10 rants…
• @Surprised at the number of TVs - 1) Free cable. 2) Most TVs made after 3000 BC make it very convenient to use as an external display for your laptop. You can easily watch your "commercial-free" Netflix and Hulu on these obsolete inventions of the 90s.
• I hope Pine gets fired so her awesome TA Laura can teach class again.
• I don't understand why my roommate decided to live in an apartment if she doesn't know how to cook or clean anything.
• This breast feeding thing isn't a women's issue. It's a stupid issue.
• The moment when no one has classes on Wednesday and you have four #fail
• To the weak child complaining about the term feminazi, FEMINAZI FEMINAZI FEMIZANI FEMINAZI FEMINZAI FEMINZAI FEMINAZI FEMINAZI
• Professor Pine is legitimately crazy. Her "expose" had to be satirical, right? Right?
• OF COURSE people are ranting about first world problems! WE LIVE IN THE FIRST WORLD! Most of us attend AU, a ridiculously expensive private school! Eagle Rants were created so that people could complain about stupid stuff at AU, such as the fact that the package system is a bit hopeless. YEESH!
• PLEASE stop sneezing into your hands! You touch EVERYTHING with your hands--including your own face, about 250-300 times an HOUR. Sneeze into the crook of your elbow instead. Please. It's that easy and it won't make me afraid to shake hands with you.
Also get the flu vaccine please. It's free on campus for students.
• Dear former biddy: You forgot to mention how COKED UP all of D Chi is, just saying. Also TKE is good NOW, sorry you're old and missed the whole mansion thing and hot new brothers.
• everyone keeps talking about that coffee shop in SIS, but i still cant find it :(
• Americans are juvenile and puritanical.
• Lol @ the Eagle. Why was the coverage of the upcoming Aung San Suu Kyi event so scant?! I spotted it and I was like….What?! Why is this not the cover story??!!? The front page read something to the effect of - "Frats got freshman too drunk". Hardly an event if you ask me. AUNG SAN SUU KYI IS COMING TO AU. TO ATTEND THE EVENT YOU HAVE TO ENTER A LOTTERY. WTF?!?!?
• The bees man, the bees. What is up with all the killer BEES? Walk out of Leo and the trash can by the door is one massive hornets nest. Then you have to confront several other containers all the way up the amphitheater to class! Who wants to have to risk their own life every time they leave the dorms? I hate wasps, GAHHHHH!!!!!
• R.A.B. you are my hero. Sincerely, All is Well
• Adrienne Pine made me gay.
• Adrienne Pine breastfeeds in class. Does that mean I can pee on the floor?
• If you are worried about being exposed to germs or getting a sickness from a crawling infant you really need to re-evaluate your life and maybe decide to live in a closed off sanitary room or in your own little bubble. Professor Pine had every right to breastfeed her child wherever she deemed fit and people need to get over it and move on. And I hardly think what Professor Pine wrote in her post is bullying because let's be honest Eagle reporters have no souls or brains for that matter.
• So THIS is what college life is like…#spinthebottle #sofun #wastedwendesday
• How can I get in on the weekly spin the bottle games? Is it just upperclassmen or can freshmen come too?
• AU clubs, why do you have to plan all of your meetings in an overlapping fashion? You know I want to come to all of you, why would you make me choose?
• Spin the bottle was kind of scary last week and was almost busted. I don't know if I'm up for round 3
• @DRUGRUG ...i feel u bro
• i saw prof. pines nipple opps lolol
• I'M QUEEN OF THE QUAD
• Giggles with Wiggles
• man i love leilani alexa #presidentclassof2016
• ERIC MORREL FOR PHI MU BIG MAN CAMPUS
• when is phi mu big man campus?
• Where can I get one of those shirts with the greek symbols on it? They aren't in the bookstore
• when can i join a sorority?
• rank the sorority 1-7 all of them
• @stankyfriend- see you at 8 for #spinthebottle2012
• soooo my friend found a worm in her tdr mac and cheese
• To the beautiful blonde girl with white Ray Bans smoking outside of Hurst Wed. at 2:30ish… You are beautiful and I would love to take you out on a date if I wasn't such a sad shy fool.
• I found a fingernail in the guacamole #boycottTacoTuesday
• lol oops i lost a craisin in my bra
• i peed ^.^
• i pooped in tdr bathroom 0.o
• why did the 2016 party group die :( i'm just trying to meet boys!!
• i have a mosquito bite directly above my butt hole and it might be a tumor
[Editor’s Note: It’s naht a tumahh]
• I think Larry the Cable Guy is one of the most annoying celebrities ever. Why does he keep popping doing ads for EVERYTHING? Best advertising turn-off ever.
• @"I don't have the typical AU-sorority-or-vegan-ballerina-girl body type" I don't know if you've ever met more than two girls in a sorority or even just walked past the marketplace ever but there's not even close to one body type. Grow up and stop antagonizing people you are jealous of. It's all about confidence so go get some of that instead of picking on everybody else?
• Abroad is cool and all but I really just want to come back and hang out with all my friends.
• "Lisa you a tearing me apart!"
• The underrepresented minority 56% of the population, yeah women have it rough. (58% of the voting population.) Cannot women just agree that it is other women and not males holding them back?"No! No!" the Sociology student will exclaim "it is due to the structural reformist reconstruction of the continuum that has held down women." "We must formalizes an actuarial actionation plan to reconstruct the sturcturum of the modern day zeitgeist, which makes women slaves of modernity!"
• You motorboated her didn't you… you motorboating SOB!
• So asking me "What does he see in you" implies that I am not worthy of having him as my boyfriend. Ya he may be much smarter than me, but IQ isn't everything. Thank for bringing don my self esteem and being a mean friend.
• What do people do in their free time? Top 3 priorities. Go.
• To the people discussing coming from emotionally abusive families: I recommend the book Toxic Parents. I'm reading it now, and it is changing my life outlook for the better.
• Do you guys know where I can get one of those gold necklaces with a t on it?
• I can handle sharing a room with bugs/ insects when I'm in another country. But state-side at my private 50K/ year institution in my suite? Nope. I have seen wayy too many stink bugs in the last 10 minutes for my liking. And I don't even leave food out.
• I am disgusted by this professor's behavior. Does she have NO respect for her students - some of whom may be Muslim or from other conservative cultures? She should be fired…not for breastfeeding (which is inappropriate in the workplace anyhow), but for having the TA provide childcare during class. The teaching assistant should sue, since I am pretty sure that her job description as a TA didn't include "part time nanny". This has gone way to far. Please have some respect for the students that pay tuition and fire this woman.
• Anyone know someone who makes good fake IDs? So bummed ID Chief got shut down.
• @" I did not hit her, it’s not true, it’s bulls$&*t, I did not hit her, I did not! Oh hi Mark." Lets watch the room together, new best friend.
• it was freezing this morning, then burning a few hours later. what.
• oppa gangnam style.
• I want to hook up with the guy that works at the Reserves desk in the library.
• @supernatural fan -- I share your feelings!!
• That awkward moment when you show up for a quiz that your professor insisted you needed to know all of the basic safety rules for and it's on something completely different. Welp.
• Why does Public Safety launch a FULL INVESTIGATION for a ceramic sheep stolen from the library, yet does not respond to a call about a possibly RABBID RACCOON in the amphitheater? ...priority fail…
• Vegan Girl, eh? How long have you been vegan? Going on 21 months here. Also, like to cook? I love to cook. - Vegan Guy
• "@real sustainable AU" --The air conditioners in SIS, Ward, Butler, Kogod, and MGC, among other newly rennovated buildings were designed to keep the cool in with insulation, probably why you think they are running all the time. The sustainability is also based on the building material, insulation, etc… AU has an entire department dedicated to it… you should check it out.
• Can anyone at all rant here?
[Editor’s Note: yep.]
• UGH. What do I do if the people who live above me are being ridiculously loud at the Berks? Will they know it was me? I'm trying to study and they've been playing music for hours.
• What time are rants posted? we here at the phonathon need more rants
• Hardcore, Easycore, Gothcore, Technocore, Mathcore, Softcore, Sweetcore, all lead to some great music
• Yay! American University up from No.82 to No.77 on the U.S. News & World college rankings! I wonder how "Tittygate" will affect the ranking?
• @arrested development quotes: I blew myself too early
• Hey rants editor, I could get these up everyday by 5pm. Where do I apply for that job?
• This waiting till 11:59pm thing is crap. At least Zach got them up by 7pm
• So now the breast feeding story is on Yahoo… and has 2,000 comments… how did this even proliferate??
• What happened to the archive of rants? Those were always fun to look back on… Just makes it sad to think that once this next set is up, the last one will just disappear forever.
[Editor’s Note: We still have the archives, we just temporarily don’t have links to them, but they’ll be back soon.]
• I'm looking for a massage after I workout/play soccer. If any girl is willing I will also give them in return.
• This is life. People move on. That person is no longer your friend. Get over it. And I'll keep telling myself that.
• There was some chick with a denim button down shirt and shorts was so hot that my eyeballs melted down my face and onto the sidewalk.
• When I'm having a fat day, I just youtube "Runway Fails." It's incredibly sick and twisted, but when it's just one of those days, there's nothing better than watching skinny models trip and fall.
• So, have we established a posting time for posting eagle rants?
• Editor, is there a certain time we can generally expect the new rants to be posted?
[Editor’s Note: It’s just chaos. All of it chaos.]
• MY UNNI IS THE BEST UNNI
• 11:54pm and no rants? I know it's your productIon day, but seriously?
• September 12, the day with no rants…fail eagle
• I NEED A CUDDLE BUDDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• Can't wait to see my first article for the eagle posted online. :3
• So it's now September 13th and here are no September 12th rants.
• IMPEACH THE NEW RANTS EDITOR. Seriously though. Is it REALLY that difficult to post before midnight?
[Editor’s Note: I AM NOT A CROOK!]
• people on silent floor of library who talk a lot…I don't care if you are in the back room talking…WE STILL HEAR YOU! If being asked by a student 3 times to quiet down, and then being told at least twice by a library worker to quiet down doesn't convince you to quiet down…and you still feel the need to talk…well, then GET OFF THE *SILENT* FLOOR!
• I don't even go here. I just have a lot of feelings.
• I know its not true but when I heard that Professor Pine was breast feeding a sick baby my first thought was eww she will catch a fever through her nipple.
• “@Political fights
make your eyes shine brighter blue
Come canvass with me”
• The day the Eagle Rants died :'( Bye bye Miss Eagle Rants obsession.
• Is it too late to go through my slutty phase?
• Where are Sept 12th rants. Pine might be right about you being a 3rd rate paper if you can't meet your deadlines.
• It's literally the worst situation in the world when you're talking to someone, and then you feel an inexplicable urge to poop. And then they go for a hug.
• Are you guys serious? Quit dropping the ball, rants editor– or step aside and let a more capable person take the job.
• Are you guys serious? Quit dropping the ball, rants editor– or step aside and let a more capable person take the job.
[Editor’s Note: Rant so nice he had to say it again.]
• someone fire the new rants editor, I still haven't seen the rants from the 12th and it's 10am on the 13th. please let me do it, I'll have them out at a reasonable hour for the student population
[Editor’s Note: The Rants Editor does not choose the job, it chooses him.]
• That really sexy guy that won't leave you alone when he's drunk, but ignores you like the plague when sober… :-(
• All the guys on Anderson 2 are so hott…but they're all straight! :'[
• My computer is getting slow!!! Noo bad bad bad!!!
• Can we become an accredited research university already?
• Don't send me an e-mail saying to pick my package up right away if you don't open until 7. And if you're sitting in the package room. Doing nothing.
• I plan to rant about Adrienne Pine until she gets fired.
• Adrienne Pine should be fired.
• Heather Mongilio is clearly a respectful, sincere journalist. Adrienne Pine is clearly a childish, self-centered ass.
• September 12, 2012: A day that will go down in our history as the day without rants.
• i'm kind of disappointed that there wasn't more publicity for AUSG's artie ward week - I only found out today (thursday) that it was this week… I knew the student involvement fair was yesterday (Wednesday) but i didn't realize that it fell over ward week. Living off campus doesn't help. Can AUSG fix this? (I follow them on facebook and twitter… and yet i didn't see anything). Thanks!
• All the negative comments disgust me about this breastfeeding issue. Until you are a mother and put in a difficult situation, don't judge!
• fire the new guy.
[Editor’s Note: I’d sign that change.org petition]
• @anySupernaturalfanshere? YES!! I might actually die when the new season comes out!!
• I want to here from more slutty chicks and less about cuddling
• Alright, so I'm just going to say it: I don't know what the hype is about the Dav's coffee. I've never personally been a fan of the taste of burnt rubber, but if you guys are, by all means, pour more money into it.
• the only reason people were offended by professor pine breastfeeding is because she didn't share with anyone else
• Where is the Eagle paper and where are the rants? Come on!!
• Dear fetish wonks, Eagle Rants is not 4chan. Shoo.
• YOU ARE TEARING ME APART LISA!!!
• That moment when your roommate comes home and you die a little inside.
i wanted to see her breastfeed
• @TV in rooms rant= FYI, not every show can be watched via hulu and netflix costs a good deal of money especially for the fact that they don't put current TV episodes online and every good movie must be ordered and shipped in the mail, not available instantly. TVs provide students to watch what they want when it is actually on and don't take up that much room..
• does the person who wanted to start an anti-bullying club still go here/want to meet up ever?
• It's the 13th. Where are the rants??
• holy shit space jam in the ampitheater tomorrow night? finally AU shows a good movie
• @ RAB: You made my day. I love you and I want to have your children. Or we can just be friends. Either is fine with me.
• @Having a planner makes me feel so much more responsible.
YES! Holla out to my fellow OCD, semi-productive, psuedo-intellecutal types who carry around their color-coded, to-do list filled Moleskines like it's there job.
• Write a story about the strength of parenting rather than trying to find a sensation. News flash: breastfeeding isn't sensational anymore. Sadly enough: good parenting is…
• All the guys here are too alpha for me to date. I just want to be able to play vidya with my boyfriend (that isn't Call of Duty). Where the hell are all of the socially awkward nerds at? The answer is, of course: in their rooms, where I can't meet them.
• What's with the recent "ironic Doc Martins" trend? I feel like the only real skin on this campus.