• A friend and I crossed streams in the bathroom in the same toilet at a party when we were both hammered. It was beautiful. Much better than you two peeing in harmony.
• The mathematical purpose of slope fields is to laugh at students.
• I’ve always been super straight laced, but after going to two frat parties (and not even getting drunk) I want to go out EVERY night.
• @straight (and single)
Aww, that’s adorable. I’m not the original vegan-ballerina ranter, but where have you been all my time at AU?”
• To the guy at open mic who sang both the guy and girl parts of some non-screamo song by a screamo band: You are adorable. Marry me?
• Confused freshman here. Which frats have the best parties? I’ve only been to Alpha Sig so far, but I’ve heard good things about some of the others (TKE) and really bad things about one (EI…)
• “You’re paying exactly zero dollars and zero cents to go to school here. Your parents on the other hand. #typicalAUstudent #firstworldproblems”
dude, are you serious? I wasn’t even that ranter, and like, a lot of us pay our own tuition. rude much.
• Okay, it’s work to sort packages, but every time I walk by the front desk, the person there is doing homework or watching TV. Sorry I expect you to work for the ENTIRE time that you’re being paid, not just in short bursts of productivity. There’s absolutely no reason why packages should only be available for 4 hours a day in an obscure location.
• I think I am becoming an alcoholic…don’t quite know how I feel about this
• I didn’t know heart break, until you broke mine. And what makes it worse, when we’re in class together, it’s so easy for you to act like I don’t even exist. What happened to when you said I was your world?
• Is it bad that I only feel good about myself when I never eat? If I eat a meal, I hate myself.
• Sometimes I get paranoid that people I know will read certain rants and assume I ranted about them. Or maybe it’s just me?
[Editor’s Note: I know that feel.]
• There’s something about unwrapping cheese that makes it so much more enjoyable to eat.
• @”yea its a gen ed, but there are over a dozen other classes you can take for that credit.” By your definition every class at AU is an elective. There is always a choice in which class to take. An elective means “not a gen ed”. Such a biddie.
• You forgot the rant box on the 9th. grrr
[Editor’s Note: It was terrible, and I took a lap]
• @“AU is sexist, and the responses to Professor Pine prove it.” Standing up to an immature slander of students is sexism now? Lol And I love how you cite no evidence of sexism, just spout your insult with no facts to back it up. Typical feminazi.
• Re: “Where is this article about Ms. Pine??” : Have you heard of the google?
(The article is on counterpunch.)
• AU needs a Disney acapella group.
• @“and the fact that I didn’t rape anyone that night. I was asleep.” LMFAO
• “Eagle: Can you consult with the administration and let us students know: Is it against university for professors to identify specific AU students on the internet in a negative light? Are Eagle writers considered public figures and thus immune to such a university policy? Even if they are considered public figures, does this apply to not only their published writing but also their conversations, emails, and actions? We students would like to know these answers.” Oh hey, Adrienne Pine! When did you become a student?
• Still crazy about you..
• “AU-sorority-or-vegan-ballerina-girl body type” This is rather a-typical of AU.
• I don’t understand. We have been dating since finals. I just want to sex you.
• That moment when no one in the club you are on the board of knows you are dating someone else on the board. Heehehehehe.
• Georgetown communications program
< AU's comm. program. But, why doth The Eagle suck so much and The Hoya be so professional?
• I am a beautiful animal.
• Can't wait for the cold weather cuz I can rock the turtleneck and chain again.
• I like… computer. I like… books. I like… sheep.
• I deserve some celebratory sex.
• "Eagle rants about
Must be at AU"
• Shame on The Eagle for harassing a professor in pursuit of a completely unnewsworthy "story."
• David Fletcher is a god of advising and will forever be a favorite. :3
• I like to think of six impossible things before breakfast
• Honestly, I don't know why girls complain about finding straight, single guys on campus. I'm going into my third year here at AU and my dating life is still going strong. Maybe all you girls ranting about finding a guy should actually get up and go find one, its really not that hard.
• To the guy who always wear tan pants outside Leonard and smokes -- are you single and gay?
• It's always nice to have bugs in your salad. Go AU!!
• @AU is sexist: While behaviors like breastfeeding should not be looked down upon in a sexist manner, it is still not appropriate to do so in the middle of teaching a class. Let's not bring sexism into this arguement- Ms. Pine was doing an acceptable thing at a VERY wrong time.
• @bite on date rape: as a girl who's had blackout, regrettable sex…I totally agree with what you're saying
• Vegan guy here, where are my fellow vegans at?
• I wouldn't say my parents were abusive (I would say they are wonderful and I love them), but they and the rest of my family are really high strung and get angry easily. I couldn't believe when I got to AU that some people can cope with being stressed or upset without getting angry at everyone around them. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, and it never did. It sucks to have a parent who let you down, but I hope you can get some relief by knowing that a lot of us out there won’t.
• Have a happy Suicide Awareness Day and a happy 9/11!
• Can someone explain to me why people are blaming The Eagle for publishing something that they never actually published?
• Professor Pine's write-up on counterpunch.org is ill-spirited and rude to student journalists and the university itself. These dogmatic academic types never admit their inappropriateness, but rather scorn at the "uncultured" world around them.
• To the individuals in Hughes 3 who have two giant eyes on their windows that stare into my room in McDowell: You are creepy as f***.
• @Single Straight guy
What kind of a sign? A smile? A wave? An add on facebook?
I honestly want to know because I feel like neither side is willing to make a first move… ever.
• This semester would be so much easier if I could just make myself temporarily asexual.
I'm sick of having my penis and my brain fighting all of the time.
• Yes, you can say hi to me. No, you do not have to act like I'm an extraterrestrial. I make great conversation, I am not boring, and I most certainly do not bite.
• shut up
• @hughes 5 cuddler: touche. I propose a meeting on neutral territory then, to ease the awkwardness. Say the staircase outside Hughes, Wednesday at 3PM? Respond in Tuesday's rants if you're interested
• Murakami? Undeniably hipster. Those conversations are what Tumblr is for, not Eagle Rants. Remember that. And yes, I just broke the number one rule.
• Abroad and totally loving it but reading these recent rants really made me miss AU.
• Does anyone else feel awkward when freshman freak out about possibly failing their first assignment and then proceeds to break down talking to the professor? I do.
• Full house is back on Nick at Nite starting today (9/10) at 8pm. Get excited
• 8:30 PM and no September 10th rants yet. Unacceptable
• dear british girl who worked at the aquatic olympic center this summer…you’re annoying.
• Hey McDowell 6 girls, the guys that live right next to you wish you’d stop by sometime. we’re always chilling, you should come join us.
• Seriously, girl with the white shirt and guy with the blue shirt sitting in the silent floor of the library at 9pm on Monday night. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU. STOP TALKING. THIS IS THE SILENT FLOOR. GO TALK ABOUT YOUR STUPID STUFF IN MGC OR WHATEVER.
• Ughhh it’s only Monday.
• AND NOW THEY ARE BEING JOINED BY AN ASSHOLE BLONDE WITH STRIPED SHIRT AND THEY ARE HAVING A FULL ON CONVERSATION.
• I hope the people who talk in the silent floor of the library die slowly and painfully.