Editor’s Note: Have an enjoyable July 4th week, dear Eagle Ranters!
•If you think you deserve to be engaged after a certain amount of time or based off of other peoples’ relationships, YOU ARE NOT READY TO BE MARRIED. Your rant makes you sound like one of those women that is obsessed with being “engaged” and having a “wedding” but not the actual “marriage” part. I feel bad for your boyfriend.
•Y’all are seriously depressed. Can we please get some happiness up in this joint? It’s summer; you don’t have to eat at TDR; that annoying high maintance barbie you called a roommate is on the other side of the country; you get to drive instead of dealing with the shuttle and Magic Mike comes out on Friday (hopefully in Imax.) Quit your whining.
•Hey preachy vegetarian/vegan/rastafarian get off your high horse you worthless woman. Child soldiers in Africa and you feel the need to devote your energy to protecting animals? Seriously, that is what matters to you? If it were up to people like you in the world we would put jackals in play pens with our babies because “who are we to judge one life being from another.” F*&^ Off.
•Girl who works out for her boyfriend, we as guys get bored. It is a fact of life and any guy who tells you otherwise is still in the honeymoon phase of a relationship (which can last years) or is bold-faced lying. Do not worry about it, just skank around like half the girls here.
•What is with all the fitness rants? AU is a C grade across the board for looks, even the girls that do work out have the faces of dogs or some other weird stuff that throws them out of the running for “real-world” hot. Same with guys of course. Go ahead people, settle and get your rocks off.
•@Whining about pricing at the Dav, really? The prices are already subsidized through the school and get off your pedestal and go to a McDonalds if paying an extra 20C is too far a burden. This school charges 50k a year and you are angry about coffee prices?
•Has anyone else noticed that the private counseling center that now advertises on eagle rants. I guess that’s what happens when here are so many emo rants.
•i miss you, but you’ll never know.
•How many calories are in the Whole Foods Sm Berry Mix? MyFitnessPal is useless. Maooooooooow!
•I wish I went to GW
•Vegetarians and Vegans are laaaaaame.
What, you gonna throw broccoli at me? Eat meat, ya wierdos!
•you can take the girl out of Jersey…
•BUT YOU CAN’T TAKE THE JERSEY OUT OF THE GIRL… I am doomed
•after watching adventureland all I want to do is hook up with the awkward guy at work… or jesse eisenberg…
•Привет из России!!!
[Editor’s Note: Привет!]
•I love summer, it’s great, but it’s time. I need to get back to AU.
•Strong women are beautiful.
•o.m.g. what. a. tool.
•Rants in a nutshell… Wahhhh “I am a upperclass white male/female/hippo with a trust fund or at least a house worth $1 million but fml” or whining that as a middle income person who has six on-cushy-campus jobs that “down with the coporations. (See even I do it!)
•@Dude who uses Magnum XL condoms: Please refrain from advertising penis size on internet. Inappropriate.
•Heads up: If you remember UPN9, you’re old.
•This one guy has been trying to ask me out on a date since 8th grade. I’m now a sophomore. Buddy, if that isn’t a hint I don’t know what is. MOVE ON.
•Please stop it with the stupid sailor poses already. You’re nice girls, I’ll give you that, but man you’re getting annoying.
•Will you grads leave already, I want to work at the library. You have already had several years, now go f$%$ off and allow someone else to do nothing and get paid!
•So the Supreme Court upheld the Act, well I hope everyone enjoys increased premiums. It is funny, we pretend to care about people but the fact is that the left wants to increase those dependent on the government for political purposes. This ruling will raise the costs for everyone without addressing any of the problems with healthcare. A sad day for America, but a good day for rich AU students with pricy private health plans that will be unaffected by the changes.
•Your boyfriend may not be proud of your strength, but I hope you are. You work hard for it, and those achievements rest squarely on your shoulders. There is nothing attractive about a woman who can’t take care of herself, but you are the furthest thing possible from that type of person. Don’t let anyone make you feel ANYTHING but good about that fact.
•False, everyone needs different amounts of calories. According to science I should be eating between 2000-2200 calories a day, but I only eat 1200 and my doctor says it is perfectly fine and that I’m healthy.
•Girls in the weight impress the men and embarrass the boys. Tell your boyfriend to go screw himself if he doesn’t like your body.
•Trying to imagine life without Armand’s gives me the urge to wallpaper the office of whatever bank or landlord thought it made sense to charge a local pizzeria $12,000/month in rent with Domino’s pizza dough. TASTE THE CRAPPY PIZZA YOU’VE LEFT US WITH, YOU CAPITALISTS!!!
•It was one of those nights where you find red stuff on the floor and you’re not sure whether its blood or sangria.
•What doesn’t kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn’t mean I’m over ‘cause you’re gone
•When I say I’m “getting dinner with someone” I really mean that I’m going to get white girl wasted with them.
•Things I like : Eagle rants.
Things I hate : lazy eagle staff who only post rants once a week
•Today I gave a professional contact my AU email address, and she just responded with “Jesus Christ!”
Dear AU: Could you please furnish your students with respectable student email addresses, instead of a nonsensical jumble of letters and numbers? That would be super-duper.
[Editor’s Note: Contact OIT. They can set up a proxy in a “firstname.lastname@example.org” format that you can give out to professionals. Granted, it’ll still show as the standard format when you send emails.]