• Gooby PLS.
• RIP AU Clyde’s night
• @the first ranter talking about the sexy latino…your Spanish would’ve made him shiver. Ain’t meant to be, hon. (Luckily, I am a Spanish major…)
• As a student in SOC, I’d agree with the Hufflepuff label. We’re good finders, and I think most of us pursue journalism because we think it’s the way to do right. (Everything else, like SIS Gryffindor, SPA Slytherin, etc. is way too spot on)
• @“I, too, publicly masterbate.” The sarcasm is strong with this one. I’m just wondering if the generic male population has an aversion to subconsciously rearrange his stick and berries when he’s watching tv, reading, etc. And its not like I was doing any major movement underneath, my hand was just sitting there. But sure I’ll join you at the Dav, good thing I just bought a trench coat.
• I HATE THIS SCHOOL
• @‘the lesser of two evils” correction: Oh my god you are so right. I’m not being sarcastic at all-I read that over and said to myself, “Wtf did I write?!” You have every right to call me out on that. I promise I’m not actually that stupid, I wrote that rant at like 6AM after a 16 hour stint at the library, so I wasn’t fully functioning. My apologies, and you sir/madam win the “Correct such a blatant idiot mistake” award. Thank you for your service.
• @“gay guys, my genitals, and AWESOME, A+ for misogyny!” Honey, I personally have nothing against your downstairs parts. I’m sure its very nice. I just don’t like them in general…but hey that’s what I get for choosing to be gay, right?
• how many eagle rants do you get a day?
• I didn’t have a date last night I was just being anti-social.
• The word of the day is Eleven. As in, “Eleven is the number of years in a row Navy has beaten Army.” Go Navy! Seriously though, show me another game in America where every single one of the players is willing to die for every single member of the audience. Ooh-rah.
• stop making me wait like this.
• I don’t get it I’m offering you my body, something that you made quite clear you want, and you haven’t spoken to me for a week. Make up your mind because finals have me stressed and I’m not waiting on you forever.
• @”I don’t want to like you!” Story of my life. I always fall for the girls I cannot have. Life would be so much easier if you could flip a switch and suddenly be attracted/not attracted to someone.
• When words fail, what will I do? When words fail, how will she know how I feel? When words fail, will I fail too?
• Hehehe…I call my little friend Foreskin Bowles and my girlfriends hoo-ha the “Fiscal Cliff.”
• WTF I had my phone/room key/debit card/id/license/metro card STOLEN from me at PIKE. If you took or know the person that took my black clutch containing all of my stuff please return it to public safety.
1. i deactivated my debit card & my phone is locked
2. iphone 4s are not really worth that much anyways
3. be a good person
4. i already put in a missing items report with public safety
• Talk to me girllllllllll
• GOD KAREN YOU’RE SO STUPID!
• The boy playing piano in Church this morning (11 am service) is the sweetest! I think he’s so adorable and he always holds the door for me, I would love to know him but he doesn’t know I exist
• Enough with all the Harry Potter rants. You’re gonna deal with all of these people in life, you can’t just magically sort them into good, bad, and the two useless houses. This is real life, not a playground of second graders.
• I have my eye on one frat guy, who is leaving to study abroad next semester…please. don’t. go.
• This girl was going out of her way to text me and I thought it was obvious she was trying to show she was interested. I’m interested too, so I asked her out. She said yes, but when we tried to set up an actual time, she turned around and started talking about how busy she is, almost like it’s a chore for her to make time for me. Can any ladies out there give me some perspective on this? I know it’s finals, but I don’t feel like things are exactly starting off on the right foot.
• Trapped in a study room with frat boys. Cool it with the axe.
• The Eagle’s list of best films is hilariously terrible. 2012 wasn’t a super strong year for (at least, domestic) film, but in WHAT UNIVERSE was Dark Knight Rises one of the best films of the year??? I think you’re just having residual good feelings from Dark Knight. I enjoyed TDKR like most people, but from a critical standpoint, it was pretty weak.
• Hahahahha, IR research is now 2 semesters long. Sucks to suck new freshmen.
• I just realized all of my eagle rants are about pooping on campus :(
• Au Bon Pain would be perfect for the tunnel space!! Soup + croissants + sandwiches (and AU is in the name - someone make this happen please)
• All I want to do is eat cookies while watching Homeland :( I don’t want to study.
• I can’t seem to forget about you.
• And so it begins: the last week of woozels.
• Aaron Sorkin has a really annoying voice.
• Finals. finalsfinalsfinalsfinals. Regular test on Friday and cumulative final on Tuesday. Seriously?! I keep going through my usual tools (Facebook, reddit, etc.) for distractions but the inevitable has been determined. I don’t know how I have enough earthly time to finish all this work. Oh sweet Jesus it’ll all be over soon.
• @“All I want for Christmas is a hookup buddy”
All I want for Christmas is to throw my family off a cliff in a flaming Winnebago, but we can’t have everything, now. Can we?
• @“What is AU crush?”
AU Crush is where lonely virgins meet other virgins and bludgeon each other with candy canes to a bloody pulp. It’s like Fight Club, but it sucks.