2008 Woodie Awards
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The Scene
Homes abroad prove not so homey
Cross-Cultural Dispatch: Madrid, Spain
By Carolyn Phenicie on 4/10/08
If you think about it, homestays aren't really all they're cracked up to be.
In an ideal situation, a homestay would work like this: A warm, inviting family opens their home to a foreign student because they want to gain knowledge of the student's home culture and help the student acclimate to life in the host culture. The family goes out of their way to include the student in family activities while respecting the student's independence. They expose the student to the wonders of the host country's cuisine while allowing for the student's personal preference. The family gets enough money to pay for the student's food and utility use, but certainly doesn't turn a profit in the arrangement.
Although there are certainly situations that meet this description, most fall short. The whole concept is full of contradictions. You're paying to live somewhere, so you should, in theory, be able to do what you want. Even if your host family hasn't imposed any strange rules, you still feel bound to respect the patterns of living in the house, in which you have no say. In most situations, you eat what's given to you with next to no say in what you eat from one day to the next. I, for example, have choked down hot dogs and peas while I'm here, two foods I haven't eaten for many years.
You have no say in when and how your room is cleaned or when and how your laundry is washed. When at school, I stick to an admittedly slightly compulsive laundry schedule; in Madrid, I may get it back from my señora anywhere within a three-day range. When I do my own laundry, I iron my dress clothes and not the T-shirts I wear to the gym. My señora prefers the opposite.
The whole situation is further complicated by the fact that you've been living on your own for at least two years. You've gone from eating what and when you want, cleaning when (or if) you want and generally conducting yourself in whatever manner you (and your roommates) see fit. Living in a homestay is like going home for break, only you and your host family haven't had 20-plus years to adapt to each other's quirks.
In an ideal situation, a homestay would work like this: A warm, inviting family opens their home to a foreign student because they want to gain knowledge of the student's home culture and help the student acclimate to life in the host culture. The family goes out of their way to include the student in family activities while respecting the student's independence. They expose the student to the wonders of the host country's cuisine while allowing for the student's personal preference. The family gets enough money to pay for the student's food and utility use, but certainly doesn't turn a profit in the arrangement.
Although there are certainly situations that meet this description, most fall short. The whole concept is full of contradictions. You're paying to live somewhere, so you should, in theory, be able to do what you want. Even if your host family hasn't imposed any strange rules, you still feel bound to respect the patterns of living in the house, in which you have no say. In most situations, you eat what's given to you with next to no say in what you eat from one day to the next. I, for example, have choked down hot dogs and peas while I'm here, two foods I haven't eaten for many years.
You have no say in when and how your room is cleaned or when and how your laundry is washed. When at school, I stick to an admittedly slightly compulsive laundry schedule; in Madrid, I may get it back from my señora anywhere within a three-day range. When I do my own laundry, I iron my dress clothes and not the T-shirts I wear to the gym. My señora prefers the opposite.
The whole situation is further complicated by the fact that you've been living on your own for at least two years. You've gone from eating what and when you want, cleaning when (or if) you want and generally conducting yourself in whatever manner you (and your roommates) see fit. Living in a homestay is like going home for break, only you and your host family haven't had 20-plus years to adapt to each other's quirks.
Viewing Comments 1 - 7 of 7
Hilary
posted 4/18/08 @ 2:04 PM EST
The girl that wrote this article is a complete MORON. By the sounds of the complaints of her fellow Erasmus students, they have no idea what it is to live in Europe. (Continued…)
Kyle
posted 4/19/08 @ 1:57 AM EST
I agree with the first comment. I did this program myself and the director would have done anything to make our home stays more comfortable. I know when one girl had trouble with a family, she was invited to stay at the director's home until a suitable replacement was found. (Continued…)
Anonymous
posted 4/22/08 @ 8:47 AM EST
This doesn´t make any sense. You don´t go to Spain to live in an isolated dorm and live like you do here. It´s just a part of the deal. Living with a family gives a unique perspective as to how another culture operates and I enjoyed my experience greatly. (Continued…)
Anonymous
posted 4/28/08 @ 7:51 PM EST
I completely disagree with this article. Frankly, I don't think the writer realizes how lucky she was to be so completely immersed as she was through her homestay. (Continued…)
Mike
posted 4/29/08 @ 11:42 AM EST
Carolyn,
I hope you took note of the follow up posted to this article: http://media.www.theeagleonline.com/media/storage/paper666/news/2008/04/28/Opinions/OpEd-In. (Continued…)
lauren
posted 4/30/08 @ 5:14 PM EST
Homestays are terrible and I agree with everything she said here. It is difficult to live with a host family and a lot of it isn't simply cultural differences, but idiosyncrasies within the families. (Continued…)
Virginia
posted 5/28/08 @ 11:03 AM EST
I am still currently living in Spain from the Spring 2008 semester, and I am completely aghast. Clearly, this author did not learn one thing from her abroad experience-- but that was not due to the experience she was given to make her own. (Continued…)
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